Paper Doll
Paper Doll’s Pop Culture Guide to Decluttering with Your Valentine
Happy Valentine’s Day. Today’s post is an updated reworking of a classic Paper Doll post from 2015.
When your Valentine presents you with a gift box, whether packaged in classic Tiffany Blue or wrapped in lopsided, awkwardly taped, Sunday comics pages, your heart warms. When love fills your heart, and a gift fills your outstretched hands, it’s the thought that counts.
Tiffany box photo by tommao wang on Unsplash
But other times, the people you love present you with clutter, like a pet presenting you with a previously-living mouse, and just the thought of it can add a layer of permafrost around the warmest of hearts.
As a professional organizer, I often work with clients whose efforts are not helped — or worse, are sabotaged — by their spouses or significant others. Here’s a sampling of tips to help encourage your sweetheart to join the organizing process without either of you being tempted toward tears or tantrums.
PURGE THE JUDGMENT AND TOSS THE GUILT
Start by remembering that disorganization isn’t a character flaw. It’s not a measure of your sweetie’s maturity, intellect, or innate worth. (And being organized isn’t a measure of these things either, any more than dancing or culinary skills.)
By and large, unless we’re discussing legal concerns, financial issues, or personal safety (where a disorganized kitchen turns into a case for Tyvek-suited folks from the Centers for Disease Control), organizing is rarely a matter of right vs. wrong, but one of effective vs. ineffective.
It’s just a mismatch between the skills and systems already in place and the ever-changing demands of the world, including your demands (ahem, expectations) of your loved one.
Making people feel guilty about their clutter doesn’t help — and indeed, it can hurt their self-esteem and the loving bonds you share. Instead, create a guilt-free environment in which both getting organized and being organized can be seen as beneficial, fun and easy.
CATEGORIZE THE PURPOSE: START SPEAKING THE SAME LANGUAGE
While this is a Valentine-y week, I think we can all agree that organizing is not a particularly romantic conversational topic. Short of sorting the candy box so that you get your caramels and your significant other gets all the cherry-filled bon-bons, talking about organizing is about as romantic as planning who will clean the bathroom and checking off expenses while filing your taxes.
While the organizing isn’t going to make anyone think “hubba hubba,” life once you are organized is more relaxed and enjoyable, and that is, obviously, more conducive to romance.
Moving forward depends on making sure you start from the same place. Perhaps you’re aware of The 5 Love Languages, starting with the book by Gary Chapman?
For example, you may know that your love language is “acts of service” and suspect your spouse’s love language is “words of affirmation.” Meanwhile, your honeybunny doesn’t have a clue about that and feels like Captain Picard relaying the Epic of Gilgamesh while trying to learn the metaphors of Tamarian before it’s too late.
As an aside, for those unfamiliar, Star Trek’s Tamarians spoke entirely in metaphors related to heroic archetypes. Meanwhile, references to this episode, Darmok, have become symbolic of all the memes that reference all the memes.
I saw these awhile back, more or less pointing out the same thing! pic.twitter.com/NpEWAv0G1n
— Dana McKiernan (@UnlikelyLass) October 24, 2020
My point? You’re going to have to get on the same page and tell your loved one that for the two of you to face the beast at Tanagra (a common foe) you’re going to have to become Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra (and work together).
Start by making sure you both understand what it means to be organized, and why it’s important to get organized.
For example, visual appeal just isn’t a huge motivator for many individuals. If someone is not already actively concerned with how things look, feeling pushed to declutter merely to make the house “pretty” is often a deal-breaker.
Instead of aesthetics, focus on the major tangible, temporal, and experiential benefits of getting organized. Discuss how some new skills and systems will help the family save money (which can be better spent on nifty items and meaningful experiences).
Show your sweetheart how the clutter of too many things in various locations (rather than in unified, categorized, even *labeled* storage) means it’s hard to find things, and how, when things are difficult to find, we tend to buy duplicates and triplicates.
Reflect upon how disorganization often means missing deadlines (for filing taxes, returning rented items, paying bills, etc.), thereby causing you to have to pay fines and fees, or pay higher prices when coupons or discounts have expired.
Explore how a few organizing tweaks may also save time. If cluttered possessions make it hard to find everything from a clean shirt to the phone charger to the invitation to a wedding you’re attending, it’s slowing you down, giving you, your spouse, and the family less time to focus on doing the things you actually enjoy.
If disorganization is causing you anxiety, explain that to your loved one, too, and approach it without blame. If you can clarify that cluttered paperwork and passwords for handling your finances makes you feel uneasy about the future, that shared clarity gives you a starting point for discussion.
Let your beloved know that you don’t see the time spent organizing as the goal, per se, but as a way to get to the goal of having more personal and family fun time.
Show your spouse or significant other the way organization (at home, at work, and for special events and activities) can reduce stress and increase overall productivity.
IDENTIFY THE CHALLENGES SO YOU CAN MAKE ORGANIZING EASIER
Once you’ve developed a common language and goals, brainstorm together how you can make the process easier. Ask your darling what makes participating in the current system difficult in the first place.
Obstacle #1: The Where
Does your sweetie leave a phone charger, wallet, keys, pocket change and clothing in little piles all over the kitchen, living room and bedroom? Does your dearie feel like there’s no place or space designated just for him or her?
Perhaps the solution is as simple as figuring out what spaces would be convenient for each (a valet hook inside the closet, a bowl and charging block on a table in the entry nook, above a drawer designated just for them) and declaring them official!
Are they putting things down instead of putting things away because they don’t want to be “made wrong” by storing something where they think you’ll say it doesn’t belong? Do they cringe at the prospect of feeling clueless or being corrected? (And can you acknowledge that, in pursuit of a more organized space at home, you have fallen into the habit of nagging parent instead of helpmate?)
Find ways to be equal partners, instead. Make decisions together, and then label the spaces so everyone feels empowered to put things away.
Ask your beloved if there are current storage areas that aren’t convenient — places where items are housed that don’t feel logical, or aren’t easily accessed — and rethink the placement. Perhaps the labels for the family filing system aren’t as intuitive as you think, leading to paperwork procrastination?
Everything should have a home, and if the storage place is conveniently located and labeled, it makes it easier to put things away.
Paint an outline of the tools that go on the pegboard in the garage to make it simpler to return them.
Work together to label family financial, legal and medical files, or label the edges of shelves in the linen closet so everyone knows where twin sheet sets should go.
If you or your sweetie is artistic, sketch a fun little map of where foods belong in the fridge or pantry and post it on the door.
Obstacle #2: The When
Is “when?” more of a problem than “where?” Does your spouse or significant other just not remember to do the tasks because of “clutter blindness?” If visual triggers don’t work, what about a cell phone alarm at certain times of the day, with ring tones of songs that are funny or keyed to the task at hand?
Is time more of an obstacle than memory? Build time into the family schedule (perhaps a nightly 15 minutes before dinner, or mid-morning on Saturdays) for everyone (kids and grownups who act like kids, alike), to tackle their organizing tasks and brainstorm solutions to frequent annoyances.
Obstacle #3: The How
Even when you agree on the destination, it’s easy for you and your special someone to disagree on the journey.
Perhaps one of you came from a background where each person was assigned a set of chores (possibly based on now-outdated gender expectations) while the other was taught to pay attention to all the undone tasks and address them immediately.
An un-filed bank statement? Groceries not put away? An empty toilet paper tube not replaced with a fresh roll? To your mind, whose job is this? This is such a common refrain that the TV show Everybody Loves Raymond created an entire episode over whose job it was to unpack and put away a suitcase.
The person who was trained to recognize unfinished tasks can easily become frustrated and (understandably) feel like they’re doing all the work, while the person who grew up with an expectation of only having to do “assigned” tasks may not understand that in an adult relationship, there is no parent or person in charge — that having to play that role is exhausting — and no one person should have to assign tasks to the other in an equal partnership.
For this kind of “how” problem, it’s helpful to circle back to the “same language” conversation, and study up on concepts like “mental load” and “emotional labor.” Consider reading articles or books on the topic, like Dr. Regina Lark and Judith Kolberg’s Emotional Labor: Why A Woman’s Work is Never Done and What To Do About It.
Paper Doll’s 10-Minute Tasks to Make Difficult Moments Easier
Lately, I’ve been considering that it’s a bit ironic that February, the shortest month of the year, is National Time Management Month. We collectively assign the month with the fewest days to figure out how to achieve goals that would solve so many frustrations.
Wouldn’t a 31-day month be better for that?
A Necessary Caveat About “Time Management”
Time management, obviously, is a misnomer. We don’t really manage time, which is fixed. Every person gets the same 60 seconds every minute, the same 60 minutes every hour, the same 24 hours every day, and of course, 525,600 minutes in a year.
(With apologies to all of you who’d rather watch the Broadway version, linked above, than Glee‘s, but YouTube is really cracking down on music videos being played anywhere but their own platform.)
Rather, we must try to manage our attention, our energy, and our labor. Though we have the same amount of time, none of us has the exact same quality of our time, nor the same obligations.
The single, healthy, unencumbered twenty-something with a salaried office job has more (financial, as well as temporal) resources than the mom of two working multiple retail jobs, or the person going to school while taking care of an elderly parent, or the individual struggling to make it through these crazy times with a chronic illness, visible or invisible.
Often, when the media has articles on time-saving tasks, they fail to acknowledge the complexities of life. If you are beyond the juggling and are full-on struggling, we professional organizers and productivity consultants see you. And we know that when the you-know-what hits the fan, you’ve got limited energy and time to deal.
So, today’s post has ten-minute tasks (or projects that can be handled as a series of ten-minute tasks) that will make things easier for you and your family when things get “ouchie.”
Check and Update Your Beneficiaries
You don’t even have to do these all at once, though if your paperwork is already organized, it should only take you a couple minutes for each. Though the time investment is small, the ease of mind it will bring (both now, and in the future) is tremendous.
And yes, you can even consider these two separate tasks (the checking and the updating) so you can make two different checkmarks on your task list.
Pull out the file folders or head to your online accounts and check to see who you previously listed as your primary and secondary beneficiaries for any of the following you may have:
- life insurance policies
- annuities
- pension accounts
- Individual Retirement Accounts (IRAs)
- 401(k)s, 403(b)s, and other retirement accounts
- profit-sharing plans
- brokerage/investment accounts
Obviously, a beneficiary is someone who gets a benefit. When we’re looking at financial documents, beneficiaries are the people (or sometimes entities) that the account holder designates as the recipient of any assets in that account when the account holder eventually shuffles off this mortal coil. (I know, nobody likes to use the world “death” or think about it, but that’s why we have life insurance policies, wills, and similar accounts and documents — to make things easier when someone has passed away.)
“The Reading of the Will” — central to any good murder mystery
In most cases, setting a beneficiary (and usually both a primary and secondary beneficiary) is part of the required paperwork. Some states (usually “community property states”) require you to list your spouse (if you have one) as your primary beneficiary for retirement and other accounts.
You may be wondering, if you have a will, why do you need to name beneficiaries? That’s a darned good question.
The main reason is that when a person dies, a will goes through “probate,” a legal process where the court in your jurisdiction supervises all the assets in your estate getting distributed hither and yon. Depending on the situation, it can be murky and complicated, and take a long time, which is pretty miserable if your people need those funds.
However, whenever you have a beneficiary set in your insurance policies and various financial accounts, that money can go straight to your intended recipient as soon as the insurance or financial institution gets proof that you are no longer among us. That usually just amounts to a certified copy of the death certificate and some proper ID.
If you set your beneficiaries for any of these accounts several years ago, you may have picked someone no longer appropriate — parents who are no longer living (or not able to manage their own finances), former spouses or significant others, or even friends who are not part of your active life anymore.
I went through the “check the beneficiaries” process with one client who was shocked to realize that she’d never gone back to revise the beneficiary on a small 401(k) plan she’d never bothered to roll over from a job decades earlier. (Note to readers: don’t do that. Roll over your retirement accounts so you don’t have to hope your former employers have stayed solvent and managed your funds properly.)
Imagine my client’s shock when she realized that her [expletive deleted], [expletive deleted]ing [expletive] of a [expletive deleting] ex-[expletive deleted] husband was still her beneficiary! Be assured it did not take her ten full seconds, let alone minutes, to get cracking on changing that beneficiary!
Imagine my client's shock when she realized that her *expletive deleted*, *expletive deleted*ing *expletive* of a *expletive deleted*ing ex-*expletive deleted* husband was still her beneficiary! Share on XIf you never set your beneficiaries before or your want or need to change them, you’ll need a few pieces of information, like their Social Security numbers, birth dates, and contact information (like phone numbers, email addresses, and mailing addresses).
EXTRA CREDIT: Here’s a time-saver so you don’t have to go through this entire process in the future:
- Create a spreadsheet (or even a handwritten note) with the first column listing all of your account names.
- Create a column and list all of the beneficiaries as they stand now.
- Create a column entitled “as of” and list today’s date.
- Any time you acquire a new policy, add a line to this list. Any time you revise a beneficiary, revise the spreadsheet.
This way, whenever you’re not sure whether you’ve updated your beneficiary, you’ll only have to look in one place.
EXTRA, EXTRA CREDIT: Checking your beneficiaries is easy and quick. Changing/updating them should be easy, but how quickly you can accomplish it depends on whether your insurance or financial institution will let you do this all online. But making this list is definitely easy and quick.
However, to take it a step further, fancy-up this spreadsheet with another ten-minute (or so) task.
Add columns for your account number, and the name, email address, and phone number of your insurance agents and financial brokers associated with each policy or account. Create a column to explain what kind of policy or account it is. And then make sure that someone you trust, like the person who has your Power of Attorney, has a copy or can access it when/if necessary.
Put Your Emergency Contacts On Ice
“Downtown Hospital Ambulance” by sponki25 is licensed under CC BY 2.0
In the early 2000s, first responders in the UK started suggesting that people list their “In Case of Emergency” contacts as “ICE” on their cell phones to make those contacts easy to locate. The idea quickly took hold in North America.
While first responders, themselves, generally don’t have the time (or authorization) to contact someone for you, nurses and hospital staff often do need to obtain important medical information when you are not able to provide it. That’s where your contacts come in.
As cell phones got fancier, the lock screens made accessing ICE contacts more difficult, but now, even if you are not able to respond, medical personnel may be able to use your thumb print access or facial recognition to get your emergency contact info.
But there’s something else you can quickly do to make sure your emergency contacts can, um, get contacted. Add your emergency contacts to your cell phone’s lock screen.
On an iPhone:
1) Go to the Medical ID screen. You can get there one of three ways:
- Long-press on the Health app icon. That will bring up a screen that looks like this:
- You can also manually open the Health App by tapping on it, then on your profile image, and then selecting Medical ID.
- Or go to Settings, then Health, then Medical ID.
2) Tap Edit.
3) Fill in all the fields that you want, but if there’s nothing significant, it’s better to type “none” than to leave it blank (so that you’re not leaving anything open to interpretation). There are fields for medical conditions, allergies, medications, blood type, weight, height, and emergency contacts. (Bingo!)
At the top, there’s an option to put in your photo. Do that; it ensures that an emergency responder can verify this is your phone.
4) Choose a name and phone number (or two names and numbers) for your Emergency Contact(s). Be sure you select names/numbers that already exist in your contacts list.
5) Scroll down to the section for Emergency Access.
6) Enable “Show When Locked” and “Share During Emergency Call.”
7) Tap “Done” at the top right corner to save your info.
Now, go look at your lock screen. You should see the word “Emergency” in the lower left corner of your iPhone. If your phone is locked and someone taps that, they can see your emergency information but nothing else.
If you don’t see the word “Emergency” there, hold down your power button (or power and volume-down buttons) as if you were going to turn off your phone and you’ll see the Medical ID access. (I guess it all depends on which version of iOS you’re using.)
For more information about the iOS Medical ID, Apple has a detailed page of instructions and explanations.
Assuming you have a photo somewhere on your phone to add in the photo field, this can usually be completed in well under 10 minutes. (The only sticking point is if someone has many medications or allergies they have to list.)
On an Android Phone
Although Android phones do not have one default health-related app, you can easily show your emergency contacts on your lock screen in one of two ways.
Method #1
- Open your Settings app.
- Tap “User & Accounts” and then select “Emergency Information.”
- Tap “Info” and then “Edit information” to enter any medical information you want to store.
- Tap “Add Contact” to add a person from your contacts list. Note, you might have to click on “Contacts” first to be presented with the list
Method #2
Android phones will let owners put any message directly on the lock screen.
- Open your Settings app.
- Tap “Security & Location.”
- Tap “Settings” next to “Screen lock.”
- Tap “Lock screen message.”
- Type your primary emergency contact (and, if applicable, any medical conditions). You could type, “In Emergency, call Lin-Manuel Miranda” and his number. What? Can you think of someone more comforting to have around in an emergency? OK, maybe Stanley Tucci. Or Paper Mommy.
- Tap “Save.”
After you’ve set this up, your ICE information can be found by swiping upward on the lock screen and tapping EMERGENCY and then “Emergency information.”
Do An Inventory of Your Essential Documents
An emergency is the worst time to realize you have no idea where your important documents are. Do you know which of these documents you have and where you can find them?
- Birth Certificate
- Social Security card
- Marriage License and Certificate
- Divorce Degree
- Military Separation Papers
- Death Certificate
- Passport
- Durable Power of Attorney for Finances
- Healthcare Proxy or Durable Power of Attorney for Healthcare
- Living Will or Advanced Medical Directive
- Last Will and Testament
- Digital Will
- Driver’s License
- Voter Registration card
- Vaccination Record
- COVID Vaccinate Card
- Professional license(s)
- Other licenses
As with the beneficiaries section above, a great way to save time is to make a list (think of it as a treasure map) of where each of these documents are located. Use Excel or a Google spreadsheet and take note of what the document is and where it’s located (e.g., your family filing system, fireproof safe, safe deposit box, wallet, etc.).
EXTRA CREDIT: For good measure, for your passport, driver’s license, and any other licenses, take note of the expiration date.
And then for really good measure, put a reminder task in your phone to alert you one month before your any of these items expire to make sure you address renewals. (Give yourself a longer lead-time to renew your passport; also, as you’ve probably not been traveling out of the country in the last two years, you should check to make sure your passport hasn’t already expired.)
If you have a lot of documents, just do a few every day and you’ll be amazed at what a few ten-minute tasks can do to put your mind at ease.
EXTRA, EXTRA CREDIT: The Paper Doll archive has extensive information about what documents you should have and what to do if they’re missing. These posts are a great place to start.
How to Replace and Organize 7 Essential Government Documents
How to Create, Organize, and Safeguard 5 Essential Legal and Estate Documents
The Professor and Mary Ann: 8 Other Essential Documents You Need To Create
Protect and Organize Your COVID Vaccination Card
Paper Doll acknowledges that I write longer-than-typical blog posts. Feel free to consider reading each one to be a 10-minute task. But the knowledge you gain will contribute to your ability to use your time more efficiently. Because, the more you know, the better prepared you are for any eventuality.
Snap Some Photos to Take Key Information With You
Unlike the vital documents listed in the prior section, there are some pieces of information you are more likely to lack at the most inconvenient times.
Toy car accident image by Andrea Closier on Pixabay
For example, if you have an auto accident and the police or first responders won’t let you get back into your car for safety reasons, you wouldn’t be able to get your auto registration and car insurance paperwork out of your car. Yes, you’d have it at home, but that would slow everything down.
Or perhaps you need to fill a prescription at a different pharmacy from usual, perhaps when you’re on vacation, and they don’t already have your pharmaceutical company discount card on record.
Or maybe you’re unexpectedly with your spouse or child or senior parent in the emergency room, and the physicians want to know what medications, at what dosages, prescribed by what healthcare providers, the patient is taking. If that information is pinned to the fridge at home, but you came directly to the ER from somewhere else, that’s frustrating.
This is where the magic of modern cell phones (which we usually bemoan for the time they steal from us) comes in handy. Consider any of the following:
- auto registration form
- auto insurance card
- health insurance card
- homeowner’s insurance card
- pharmaceutical company discount cards
- handwritten instructions of how to get to a room or office you visit infrequently
- a list of the size/type of batteries and light bulbs you use for which items in your home so that you never again have to unscrew a light bulb just to know what voltage and whether you want a skinny-base or a fat-base bulb)
- etc., for whatever is important in your life.
You could snap all of these as photographs and store them in a photo album in your phone’s photo section. Name it “Remember” or “Vital” or whatever will catch your eye.
If you want to go to the effort of scanning the document and sending it to your phone, that’s fine, but iOS has created an easy option using the Notes app.
- Open a new or existing note.
- Tap the cute little camera icon.
- Tap “Scan Documents.”
- Focus your document, card, medicine label or whatever within your camera’s viewing area.
- Then you have two options:
- Let the auto-capture work its magic as the item comes into the viewfinder and auto-focuses, or
- Click the shutter button (or one of the volume buttons) to capture the scan
- Drag the corners of the scan to do any necessary adjustments.
- Tap “Keep Scan.”
- Scan more fiddly stuff to keep it handy or tape Save if you’re done.
From here, you can save the scan in your Notes or Files app in your phone itself, or upload it to a synced app, like Dropbox or Evernote:
As an all-Apple user, I don’t have an Android-specific scanning suggestion; if you do, please add your voice in the comments.
The next time a new insurance card or other piece of important information comes your way, take a snapshot or scan to ensure you’ll have whatever you might need when you are out and about.
As I often say, organizing can’t prevent all catastrophes, but it can make many of them less catastrophic. I hope these various ten(ish)-minute tasks will help ease many of the ickier moments in life for you.
In Search of Lost Time: Productivity, Proust, and the Culture of Availability
Marcel Proust’s seven-volume novel, In Search of Lost Time, translated from the French À La Recherche du Temps Perdu, was first translated into English as Remembrance of Things Past and is known for its theme of involuntary memory.
Organize To Reverse a Bad Day
Summer Tears by Mark Seton (Creative Commons License)
In a perfect world, our time and task management wouldn’t depend upon our moods. Unfortunately, we don’t live in a perfect world.
In theory, our organizational systems should be designed so that we can accomplish our goals whether we’re feeling motivated or not. That’s the whole point of a system, to give us a framework when something external or internal prevents us from feeling our usual drive to achieve.
Last September, in Rhymes With Brain: Languishing, Flow, and Building a Better Routine, I wrote:
We also depend on activation energy. Because the hardest part of what we do is the getting started, we have to incentivize ourselves to get going. There are all sorts of ways we can trick ourselves (a little bit) with rewards, like pretty desk accessories or a coffee break, but the problem is that action precedes motivation. We’re not usually psyched to get going until we have already started!
Action precedes motivation. We're not usually psyched to get going until we have already started, whether it's a runner's high or Csikszentmihalyi's flow. Share on XWe may not feel like working out, but once we’re dressed in our best approximation of Venus and Serena, or the yogi of the moment, or whichever quarterback is getting all the endorsements, and have gotten ourselves warmed up, we’re well on our way.
When we lack our usual oomph, our knowledge of the benefits of staying organized may not be enough to keep us motivated to track our expenses, pay our bills on time, file our papers, and stick with our routines, but if we nudge ourselves with giving it just a little try (“just five minutes” or a Pomodoro of 25 minutes or whatever), we may find ourselves able to get into flow.
In other words, well begun is half done.
In that post on languishing, I talked about how to get past the (likely pandemic-induced) blahs and generate flow. We looked at several rhymes-with-brain solutions:
- Abstain from the distractions that steal your focus.
- Retrain your brain by shaking up the synapses and making different connections.
- Restrain yourself from frequenting the people who eating up your time and energy.
- Constrain your work areas and minimize the space they take up to keep from spending all your energy looking for your supplies and resources instead of using them to achieve your goals.
- Contain those items in the areas you’ve constrained (above).
- Maintain your successful routines.
- Attain (and explain) knowledge to keep your brain active.
- Gain momentum and jump-start your enthusiasm.
If you haven’t read that post, skedaddle over to it first, as conquering languishing might be just what you need.
BEYOND LANGUISHING
The problem with productivity is that sometimes, we’ll be going along just fine and hit a brick wall. If languishing is the “blah,” a really bad day is the “waaaaaaaaah.”
Judith Viorst captured it best in the title Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. Whether you remember it from childhood, babysitting days, or from parenthood, you know what she means. There are days that can go wrong and completely wreck our moods and take our whole day off course.
Organize To Pay Your Bills On Time
Photo by Leone Venter on Unsplash
After I wrote Ask Paper Doll: Should I Organize My Space and Time with Color? last week, I got to thinking about how color relates to finance, at least in terms of expressions.
Even though black usually signifies something dire, if you’re “in the black,” it means that you’ve got a net positive income, while finances that are “in the red” are considered bleak, signifying debt greater than revenue.
When you’re “in the pink” you’re in good health, financially or otherwise. And, although it would seem to make more sense that being “in the green” would mean you were flush with money, English lacks that expression. And I’ve learned that in Italian, “Sono al verde,” which literally translates as “I am at the green” means “I’m broke.” Language is funny.
You know what’s not funny? Late payments. Fines for late payments. Increased interest rates because of late payments. Lower FICO scores because of a history of late payments!
During consultations with new organizing clients, people often express frustration over difficulty paying their bills on time. Generally, it’s not that they lack the funds, but that their bill-paying systems get out of whack and fail to fit into their already overstuffed, overburdened schedules. Today, we’re going to look at strategies to get bills paid on time.
BEYOND THE BUDGET: KNOW THE WHO, WHAT, WHEN, WHERE, AND WHY
You might expect that I’d bring up the topic of a budget. Certainly, knowing all of your financial obligations is important to a smoothly-run financial life. As Charles Dickens said,
Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pound ought and six, result misery.
Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pound ought and six, result misery. ~ Charles Dickens Share on XIn order to pay your bills on time, it’s essential to know when they are due, and (if applicable) how that relates to when your income will arrive.
Make a chart of all of your creditors and bills. It’s best to do this on a spreadsheet, like Excel or Google Sheets so you can update the chart over time.
- Note when bills are due. Usually, you have three kinds of bills:
- Bills that are due on or around the same date every month (like rent/mortgage, health insurance, utility/cable/internet bills, credit card bills, etc.)
- Bills that are due on a regular cycle but not every month. They may arrive quarterly, like water bills, auto, renter’s, or homeowner’s insurance premiums, or tuition bills, or annually, like professional dues, memberships, or auto registration renewals.
- Bills that a have no regular cycle. These may be one-off bills, like occasional department store credit card purchases or service providers who bill at their convenience, sometimes after you’ve long forgotten about the expense.
- List the amounts or ranges of your regular bills.
- Some of your bills will have the same dollar amount every month, like health insurance or your cell phone bill, because they are regulated by a contract. (These are the ones that for which it is easiest to set up automated payments.)
- Other bills will vary by month due to different usage or consumption, like electric bills or credit card statements.
- List the amounts or ranges of your regular bills.
- Learn and list the penalty of paying late! — My office landline (yes, I said land line!) payment is due on the 28th of the month, but there’s a grace period until the 8th of the following month, at which point the extra fee is about $3. No biggie. However, the average late fee for U.S. credit cards is $36, and that doesn’t take into account that late payments can trigger higher interest rates. If your credit card balance includes a 0% balance transfer, you could lose that rate if you make even one late payment. Oh, and late payments can also wreck your FICO score.
Photo credit: Simon Cunningham under Creative Commons CC By 4.0 Deed
- Make a column for each month of the year so you can mark when you’ve made a payment. This way, you’ll regularly see your progress and recognize when a payment hasn’t been made.
Yes, this sounds like homework, and you may be thinking that if you had the time to do homework in the first place, you’d be able to pay your bills on time.
However, having a sense of how many bills you have, in what amounts, due when, and with what penalty for paying late, can make all the difference in getting your finances in order.
PICK YOUR BILL-PAYING STYLE
No one bill-paying system is necessarily better than the others, but picking a method that works for you will help you stay committed to the process.
Pay Bills the Day They “Arrive”
This simple strategy requires the least amount of advanced planning and you’ll never have to worry that procrastination will lead to late fees.
If you get your bills by mail:
Bring in the mail every day, open the envelopes, toss out extraneous junk and “shiny” advertising material, and pay your bills immediately. Done! (Now log that you’ve paid it on the chart.) People rarely have more than a few bills each day, and if you get in the habit of doing this diligently, it’ll take only a few minutes out of your daily schedule.
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If you have opted out of paper bills:
Open your email every day, log in (to either your bank’s bill-pay site/app, or the account’s website), pay your bill, and log that you’ve done it. Bing, bang, boom!
Paying bills the day they arrive saves time (because it’s easy to complete quickly), eliminates anxiety regarding whether you may forget to pay, and helps you stick to your budget. If you pay for all of the things for which you have already obligated yourself, you’re less likely to spend on wants before needs.
This is the easiest system, but it’s also the least-often used.
Some people avoid this option because they lack the funds to pay each bill on the day it arrives. If our two biggest bills (for example, mortgage and insurance) arrived on the same day, it might wipe out (or even exceed) our checking account balances. So, there may be a practical reason to skip this method.
But there are far more common reasons why people don’t pay their bills as they arrive.
For some, there are psychological or philosophical obstacles to using this strategy. They may think, for example:
“I’m not going to pay this bill until right before it’s due. They don’t deserve my money one minute earlier than necessary!” [Insert your own “harrumph” as necessary.]
We see this most often when someone wants to avoid paying a credit card bill before the due date. People are fine paying for their electricity or health insurance, because they see that they’re getting the benefit already, so payment feels “fair.” But with credit cards, it’s common to forget that payment was actually due upon purchase; the cards simply shifted the time frame. People forget that a credit card bill is actually an IOU, the debt having been incurred in the past.
If you struggle with this philosophy, there’s still a way to pay bills as they arrive to prevent late payments.
If you pay bills online, log in now but schedule each payment for a day or two before it’s due. (Waiting until the day it’s due can cause holiday/weekend kerfuffles.)
If you pay by check, write out the checks, but put them in your tickler file (see below) or clip them to the calendar page of the date when you’re comfortable mailing them so only that final step remains.
“I don’t like paying my bills in dribs and drabs. I want to pay them all at once.”
This is similar to not wanting to hang up one shirt, or not wanting to file each piece of paper as you finish with it, or not wanting to wash each dish (or put it in the dishwasher) when done eating. It makes sense…until you find yourself with a backlog.
Sure, there’s something to be said for flow, doing a large project once and pushing through it to give your the satisfaction of completing a major task. However, the more we let our clothes pile up on the exercise machine, the more we let our filing pile up in the office, and the more we let the dishes pile up in the sink, the more of a behemoth the task seems, and the more likely we are to procrastinate altogether.
The downside of procrastinating on those tasks are wrinkled clothes, messy offices, and dried-on kitchen yuckiness. The downside of procrastinating on bill-paying? Late fees, increased interest rates, and lowered FICO scores.
Tickle Yourself Organized
If you don’t do something immediately, you have to do it later. Sadly, that’s just one of the laws of physics, that we can’t go back in time. (That said, if you find yourself with a time machine or TARDIS, please let Paper Doll know. I have some experiments I’d like to try.)
Later requires a system, and a system requires both geographic and behavioral changes from what you’ve been doing thus far.
Photo by Nataliya Vaitkevich from Pexels
Geographically, you need a bill-paying center with the following tools:
- Tickler file, or at least a bill-paying folder
- Letter opener (to avoid paper cuts and add pizzazz to opening envelopes)
- Calculator or calculator app
- Pencil and scrap paper (if you have an untenable relationship with calculators)
- Envelopes
- Stamps
- Return address labels
- Non-washable gel-ink pens (to deter identity theft and fraud) to write out checks OR a printer if you prefer computer-generated checks
This assumes you’re getting your bills in the mail and paying them by check. If you’re paying them digitally, you can skip the envelopes, stamps, and return address labels.
The behavioral process is similar to the pay-upon-arrival system. Show up for mail call. (Seriously, I want you to open your mail every day. But if you absolutely won’t, at least put all of your mail in one spot, near your bill-paying area, and commit to opening ALL the mail at least once per a week.)
Open the envelopes, toss out the glossy advertising inserts, and if you pay online, toss the envelopes, too. Even if you’re not going to pay right away, process each bill immediately to keep it from ending up on top of the microwave or mixed in with your third grader’s math homework.
Eyeball each statement to review the charges, note any unexplained fees, and check for new policies and/or errors. (The sooner you catch a billing error or a policy change you don’t like, the easier it is to address.)
Circle or highlight the payment due date. Then figure out how far ahead you want to pay the bill. Take a glance at the calendar to make sure there are no weekends or federal holidays that might cause delivery obstacles.
If the due date is consistently inconvenient (because of when you get paid, or when lots of other bills are due), ask the vendor to change the date to a more convenient one. Many credit cards let you change your due date from inside the account profile.
Once you’ve opened each bill and figured out when you want to pay it, arrange them in chronological order by due date with the one due soonest on top. You can stop here and just tuck the stack in a folder, but longtime readers know that I encourage you to use a tickler file.
I used to tell folks to put the bills in slots at least 7 days in advance of when they’re due, but with the change in postal service delivery speeds, I encourage mailing at least ten days in advance or paying online. Or, make it even easier on yourself and only pay bills one day per week (like Tuesdays), and then just pick a pay date that’s two Tuesdays (or whichever) prior to the due date.
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