Best Results Organizing

Last week, as I walked up to a client’s door, she opened it with a giggle. “Do you realize you always arrive at exactly 12:59? How do you manage it?”

Some of it is luck. The client’s in my zip code, I don’t have to get on the highway, and (thus far) I haven’t encountered traffic delays. But I also have a client on the back side of one of the mountains near Chattanooga, and no matter how early I leave, there’s invariably an accident blocking traffic to (or up) the mountain. But in every instance, I walk out the door at the exact time I’ve intended; for my own sanity, I don’t even attempt to do anything unanticipated (especially answering the phone) in the ten minutes before I’m supposed to leave. 

Being on time is no moral victory. (Nor is being late a moral failing.) But to be a good role model for clients regarding organizing and productivity, I need to walk the talk, and time management — particularly arriving on time — is important. It’s also doable!

WHY BEING ON TIME MATTERS

Different cultures have different experiences and expectations of time. In some places, it’s considered the height of rudeness to arrive after the appointed hour, whether for a meeting or social event. In others, start times are “suggestions” and arriving at the time for which you were invited might find someone still in a meeting or (for a dinner party) still cooking or getting dressed.

On The West Wing, there’s an episode where President Bartlet is interviewing secretaries and one makes a comment about how “the French have a pliable relationship with time.” Conversely, there’s this about German perceptions of punctuality:

 

For our purposes, we’ll focus on North American standards for being on time.

What’s Wrong With Being Late?

Tardiness has bad PR. It causes a wide variety of negative consequences for the person waiting and for you:

• Confusion — At the very least, particularly when the appointed meeting is at a third location (neither your home or office nor theirs), if you aren’t somewhere when you say you will be when you planned to be, like for a first date or a meeting, it can cause confusion. The person you’re meeting may fear they’ve gotten the time, the date, or the location wrong. 
• Worry — If you’re meeting someone with whom you’re close, like a friend, family member, or loved one, as the minutes click onward and you’ve neither arrived nor called, they’ll start worrying that you’re in a ditch somewhere, bleeding from a head wound. Not cool, dude.
• Inconvenience — Showing up late causes situational stress for others. If you have an appointment to see the doctor or to get a haircut and you are materially late, it forces them to determine whether to try to squeeze you in and risk making everyone else late for the rest of the day, or to give up on the appointment (which you might need very much) and require you to reschedule. In this way, being late inconveniences the person you are meeting, others with no relationship to you, and you, yourself.
• Perceived Disrespect — If there’s a power imbalance (for example, you’re late for an interview or a meeting with a prospective client), or if you exhibit habitual lateness, others are more likely to perceive your tardiness as a sign of either arrogance or laziness. 

Perception of Arrogance

With arrogance, others may assume that you believe your time is more valuable than theirs, and that you’ve judged them unworthy of the deference or respect due to them, personally or professionally.

People who are generally on time (assuming they’re from a culture that values temporal precision) take lateness as a sign of disrespect. Failure to arrive on time sets a tone for business relationships as well as friendships and romantic relationships, and you may encounter a frostiness based on an inaccurate perception of your intentions.  

Perception of Laziness

As for laziness, you may have been late because you tried to squeeze in one more sales call or review one more email, but the other person’s perception is that you couldn’t get your act together. Being late repeatedly makes a person seem flaky.

Failure to attend to small details, like arriving at the appointed hour, can make others doubt your ability to serve their needs and master larger details related to delivery dates, precise measurements, or accurate financials. If you show up late for a date, or if you call half an hour after you were supposed to have arrived at the restaurant to say you’re “Be there in 5” when you haven’t even left yet, it isn’t going to endear you to anyone. As time goes on, you may find yourself not taken seriously.

 

Stress

Think about the last time you were late, whether or not it was your fault. How did you feel? Did your heart race? Did you start to perspire? Did you react by driving faster than you normally would, or with less care? For people who value being perceived as responsible, detail-oriented, and caring, and who value the time of the person waiting, knowing that you’re running late can feel terrible.

In the olden days, before we had cell phones, if you were running behind after you got in the car, there was little you could do except rehearse your apologies and curse the traffic (and maybe yourself). With cell phones connected to cars, we can now text or call hands-free (though it’s not entirely distraction-free and still carries dangers), but being late can still be embarrassing and stressful.

Poor Self-Esteem

Nobody wants to think less of themselves. But when we make promises or agreements to be somewhere and we are not, particularly if any part of our lateness is our own fault, and even more particularly if we grew up with parents who equated tardiness with moral failings, being meaningfully late is going to wear away at one’s self-esteem.

Rather than seeing the situation as one that requires new strategies, you might start imagine yourself through others’ eyes in a not-very-compassionate way and think of yourself as a “screw-up.” 

Resentment

The harder you perceived yourself working — doing one more task before you left the office or taking care of one more thing at home — the more likely you are to be resentful when you run late. You may resent your boss or co-workers or a client weighing you down or resent loved ones for “causing” you to be late (perhaps by not fulfilling spoken or unspoken expectations).

You could unreasonably resent the person you’re meeting because they even have expectations of you. (“Why don’t they know how busy my life is?!”) You might resent your parents for not teaching you better time management skills or drilling them so intently that you rebelled against them. And  you may resent yourself for failing to live up to your own expectations.

Conversely, for what it’s worth, if you follow strategies for being on time, on the rare occasions that you are late, people will assume that it was not your fault. (However, you run the risk of your one-time tardiness being played for sport.)

 

WHY PEOPLE ARE LATE

They Have Difficulty Perceiving Time

Before I get too far into the weeds, it would be irresponsible for me not to note that in addition to the aforementioned cultural differences experiencing time, there are also neurological differences in how some people perceive time.

People with ADD and ADHD, as well those on the autism spectrum or with any of various executive function disorders, may perceive time differently. They may fail to experience or “feel” the passage of time the same way someone neurotypical does, and transitions between finishing one task and moving on to the next can be more difficult or uncomfortable to accomplish. It would be an unkind mistake to assume that they can “just set alarms” or “just leave earlier.”

Neurodivergence notwithstanding, perceiving the passage of time can be difficult for many people. Paying more attention to how long it takes to do a task, using tools that help you visualize the passage of time, and creating audiovisual alerts to transition times can help you identify when your time perception is out-of-sync with that of others. (Or maybe you’re just French and have a pliable relationship with time?)

If you tend to mis-estimate how long something will take to accomplish, if you don’t have a good sense of what ten minutes or an hour “feels” like, or if you tend to hyper-focus and aren’t aware of the march of time, the following posts may help you in this regard.

• How to Use Timers for Improved Productivity and Focus — Part 1
• How to Use Timers for Improved Productivity and Focus — Part 2: Picking a Good Timer 
• How to Use Timers for Improved Productivity and Focus — Part 3: Tangible Timers
• How to Use Timers for Improved Productivity and Focus — Part 4: Digital Timers
• How to Use Timers for Improved Productivity — Part 5: Hybrid Timers and Bonus Material

They Lack of Reality Checks on Time Use

Do you know how you spend your time?

Knowledge is power, so self-knowledge should give you superpowers. If you have a “pliable” relationship with time and are often surprised that the entire morning has gone by, or that you’ve tarried far longer on a task than you’d planned, you and the clock need to have a diplomatic summit. 

Take a reality check on how much time you use to accomplish a task. Do you rarely complete a task in one sitting? It might be due to excessive interruptions from others, or you might suffer from shiny object syndrome, ping-ponging your attention to whatever catches your eye at the time. While ADD or ADHD may be a contributing factor, it’s also possible you just never strengthened the behavioral muscles necessary to focus on one task to completion. 

A time audit may be just what you need to get a handle on where your time is leaking. My post from January, How to Use Time Tracking to Improve Your Productivity, explains how to use time tracking to improve your mindfulness and focus, better prioritize your tasks and time use, make decisions about time use based on more accurate date, reduce your stress, and be more accountable. 

It’s a known scientific phenomenon that measuring a behavior can change it. People who write down how much they eat instinctively refrain from eating when they’re not really hungry. Logging when you’re aimlessly surfing the web forces you to realize that you’re aimlessly surfing the web. Identifying how much time you spend on a low-priority task can encourage you to automate or delegate it. 

Note when you get sidetracked. An unexpected caller or visitor can throw your planned schedule out of whack. When you answer the phone and again when you hang up, take note of the time. (Your phone’s caller ID feature is useful for time tracking.) In person, don’t clock-watch while chatting, but stand up. Your back and your feet will make you more cognizant of the passage of time and prompt you to curtail stories that aren’t on point when you’re on deadline. Use time-tracking software (as suggested in the above post) to measure your digital activities. 

Finally, if your schedule is truly jam-packed and you can’t attend all of everything, it’s less disruptive to leave the first meeting early than arrive at the second one late.

They Neglect Prioritizing and Planning

Sometimes, people are late because they are either overscheduled, so they’re delayed in getting where they’re going, or underscheduled (lacking necessary structure) and don’t realize where they should be. 

via GIPHY

There are numerous posts in the Paper Doll vault regarding how to prioritize, plan, and schedule your tasks so you can accomplish what’s most important. Start with the concepts reviewed in February’s Paper Doll’s Cheat Sheet for Celebrating Time Management Month.

Too many people fly by the seat of their pants, doing things when they feel inspired or when they remember to do them. They fear that putting anything on the calendar except appointments to which they are required to show up will ruin their their inspiration and natural “flow.” 

But ask yourself, what are you good at accomplishing on time, every time? Chances are it’s what you’ve scheduled uninterrupted time to do. It’s essential to build time into your schedule for tackling all of the work to be completed. If you cringe at the idea of a schedule, fear being too regimented, and think you prefer to go by your gut, ask yourself how effective acting on instinct has been thus far for your productivity. 

Perform a brain dump and list of all of your regular activities. Sort them into categories, just like in school, when you had math (now it’s bookkeeping) or English (perhaps marketing) or debate (meetings and negotiations). All of those activities were regulated by a fixed schedule that ensured you had ample time to focus on each subject.

A bell triggered transition time. Your schedule even accounted for lunch and gym, to keep your brain and body healthy. Both work and life are learning environments, so take yourself back to school. 

We’ve often discussed how useful time blocking can be, so start by drafting the ideal calendar week so that all of the essential categories of life have time slots in which to fit them. Just as you can’t organize until you’ve reduced the unnecessary or less needed items so there’s room to fit them in your space, you will need to consider what you might have to remove from your schedule so that you have enough time to do the things you need to do and (most of what) you want to do.

If you need a little help decluttering your schedule, consider the advice in 52 Ways to Say NO to a Request So You Can Say YES to Your Priorities.

They Forget About Transitions and Obstacles

Do you carefully enter everything on your schedule but still find yourself showing up late to appointments, even when they’re online and you’re sitting right there in your chair?

You may be missing out on one of the most important strategies for being on time, accounting for delays and obstacles over which you have no control. 

Schedule Buffer Time

If you have an appointment from 1 p.m. to 2 p.m. and another from 2 p.m. to 3 p.m., it might seem like as long as the first one ends on time (and how likely is that?), you’re all set. Nope. 

When will you:

• listen to phone messages?
• check email?
• reply to messages?
• use the rest room?
• shift your mental focus?

Taking breaks is essential, both to keep your personal engine from wearing down and to ensure that there’s enough mental and temporal space between tasks. (Check out Take a Break — How Breaks Improve Health and Productivity.)

Plan buffer time before and after meetings, Zooms, business lunches. Add buffer time after your deep work sessions, as it might take your brain some time to transition after you’ve spent an hour (or hours) of focused work time on an important project.

Schedule buffer time between your last appointment and the end of each workday to review your planner, tickler file, and action items for the next workday. 

In your personal life, you have more flexibility because you can skip unloading the dishwasher or doing the laundry if your toddler is having a meltdown. But you’ll still need buffer time to cope with unanticipated problems.

Let’s say your morning schedule is usually a well-oiled machine: wake up, breakfast, brush teeth, get the kids in the car, and do drop-off at day care and school before heading to work. What will you do if your toddler refuses to wear her shoes? If you spill coffee down the front of your shirt?

  

Anticipate obstacles beyond your control: the need for safety precautions due to weather or traffic, interruptions that are both urgent and important and can’t be delegated, and technical difficulties. Life occasionally has sharp edges; pad them. 

Schedule Travel Time

Travel time is a sub-category of buffer time, and it’s one that’s likely to cause you the most frustration. Setting aside enough time to get to an out-of-office appointment (and then afterward back to work or home) means that you’re somewhat able to control for variables like extra-chatty people or if the person meeting you is running late.

You can’t control traffic, but you can schedule your day so that there’s 20% more travel time allotted than GPS says it will take. You can set a reminder for 30 minutes before you’re supposed to leave to check what GPS or Waze says is going on with traffic on your route. You can call the person you’re meeting to let them know you’ve monitored the situation and will be leaving early, but to prepare for delays.

Count Backward to Consider All Activities

When you’re planning your ability to add something to your schedule (or evaluating whether you need to subtract something, or a few somethings), count backward. If your doctor’s appointment is scheduled for 3 p.m., you’re probably supposed to be there to do paperwork by 2:45 p.m. Unless you know the parking situation well, give yourself ten minutes to park, so you need to arrive by 2:35 p.m. If GPS says it will take 30 minutes, give yourself about 40 minutes.

If you need to leave where you are by five minutes to 2 p.m., follow the most important time management rule and use the restroom before you get in the car! To accomplish all of this, you have to be dressed, with everything you need to take with you, by 1:50 p.m., which means that by about 1:30 p.m., you need to have:

• finished lunch (and brushed your teeth)
• wound down any meetings or Zooms
• anyone leaving the house or office with you ready and prepared

In other words, just because you have an out-of-office appointment at 3 p.m., it doesn’t mean you can schedule right up until the minute you have to be there.

If you count all the way back to the start of your day and find that’s where you’re getting stuck, Do (Not) Be Alarmed: Paper Doll’s Wake-Up Advice for Productivity can help you create buffer time between sleep and your first daily obligation.

GET COMFORTABLE WITH BEING EARLY

If you’re habitually late, you may subconsciously be uncomfortable with the idea of being early or kept waiting. If disorganization normally makes you feel overwhelmed and pressed for time, you’ve probably developed habits to avoid waiting for others or missing out on the productive use of your time. 

Cookie Monster meme via GIPHY

Reject the siren call of doing “just one more thing” when it’s time to make a transition to a new task or walk out the door. You may think these efforts will make you more efficient, but it’s likely you haven’t anticipated the associated pitfalls. 

To prepare for being early or kept waiting by others: 

• Double-check the meeting location and time in advance so your early arrival won’t fill you with anxiety over whether you’ve done all the right things. Review the purpose of the meeting, the details you want to cover, the questions you want to ask (or answer), and the desired result. 
• Keep your briefcase or backpack stocked with materials that will absorb your interest while you wait. If you’re a paper person, maintain a folder of clipped journal or magazine articles you’ve been meaning to read; if you’re all-digital, read the open tabs on your phone. If something triggers an actionable task, schedule it. 
• Bring a book or e-reader so that you can catch up on the business or personal reading you rarely have time to do.
• Review your running list of notes from the past week to see if anything needs to be moved to a higher priority or rescheduled. 
• Maintain social relationships with a quick text to say, “I’m heading into a meeting/doctor’s appointment/haircut but I wanted to tell you I’ve missed you and was thinking about you today.” Modern life is stressful and it’s easy to lose connection when you’re rushing around. Use “found time” to make quick connections with people who matter to you.

Become more adept and comfortable with the idea of arriving early and waiting serenely, instead of always being the last person to rush through the door, apologizing. Think of buffer time as an emergency fund for your schedule. It’s there if you need it; if not, you have something small but productive to occupy your time and thoughts. 

Think of buffer time as an emergency fund for your schedule. It’s there if you need it; if not, you have something small but productive to occupy your time and thoughts.  Share on X

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FINAL THOUGHTS ON BEING ON TIME

Some people insist that everyone has the same 24 hours each day to get everything done. However, the single mother with two jobs and an unreliable (or no) car, sometimes forced to take public transportation, or the person taking care of children while being caregiver to an ill or elderly parent or in-law has far more to squeeze into those 24 hours each day than a single dude just out of college or a person with financial means to just “make things happen!”

Similarly, if you’ve got a chronic illness or a job that has you on-call, you can’t always be where you intended (or even promised) to be, on time every time. Sometimes, you have to give yourself grace.

That’s why time management is a misnomer. You can’t manage time, but you can manage your use of it, to the best of your abilities, given the circumstances. And, if you still end up late, you can manage your attitude when you arrive: