Archive for ‘Ask Paper Doll’ Category
Paper Doll on the NAPO Stand Out Podcast: Why Paper Still Matters
Today’s Paper Doll post is part confessional, part promotional, and part educational. But first…
Have you listened to any good podcasts lately?
I love sharing my research and philosophies of organizing and productivity here in the Paper Doll blog, but I know that sometimes it’s more convenient to listen to (or watch) material that interests you. To that end, back in May, I shared Paper Doll Picks: Organizing and Productivity Podcasts, a list of my favorite podcasts and podcasters in the realms of organizing and productivity. (If you didn’t check it out previously, now is a great time to find some new favorites!)
When I wrote Paper Doll on Planning & Prioritizing for Leadership, I even gave you a two-for-one, recommending you sign up for The Leader’s Asset, a July/August interview series I participated in, as well as sharing my interview on Dr. Frank Buck: Productivity for Total Control & Peace of Mind.
If you didn’t catch my episode, “Julie Bestry: Don’t Apologize…Organize!” the first time around, you can listen at the show link or via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or all your usual yummy podcast hangouts. (Consider it a summer rerun.) Given the high temperatures around the country, why should you have to struggle and run clicking around the internet dial? Here’s the YouTube version.
Casting a Backward Glance
I started my business twenty years ago, the year that the federal government started prosecuting Enron, the term “Axis of Evil” was coined, and Kelly Clarkson won the first American Idol competition. I joined what was then the National Association of Professional Organizers (NAPO) in the spring of 2002.
When asked what I wanted to do with my business, I said that while I was looking forward to working one-on-one with clients to make their spaces more organized and their lives more productive, my dream project was to have my own newspaper or magazine column.
I started blogging (which is kind of like having a column) in 2007, the same year I became a Certified Professional Organizer.
Over the years, I’ve written some ebooks and had a book (now out of distribution) traditionally published.
I have also been interviewed for a variety of media outlets , including newspapers and magazines (including, I’m always delighted to say, Real Simple), as well as on local television and radio, and on the podcasts in the Paper Doll Picks poast, linked above.
But what I really want to tell you about is a particular career highlight for me.
The NAPO Stand Out Podcast (and a Case of Nerves)
NAPO is still NAPO, but now that stands for the National Association of Productivity and Organizing Professionals. (As you’ve probably noticed, the focus of Paper Doll has also expanded to include more time management and productivity topics, along with paper and information organizing posts.) Since 2018, NAPO has had its own podcast, The NAPO Stand Out Podcast.
The NAPO Stand Out podcast invites organizers, productivity experts, and related experts to share their successes, challenges, best practices, proven strategies, industry developments, and fabulous anecdotes. Of course I listen, as it’s tailor-made for someone like me.
Near the end of last year, the host of the NAPO Stand Out Podcast, my friend Clare Kumar, messaged me to see if I’d like to be on the NAPO podcast.
Clare is a Canadian professional organizer, coach, and media darling, and as I’ve mentioned on these pages before, has a laugh that completely draws you in. She specializes in helping Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs) optimize their professional performance, and she has her own podcast, Happy Space with Clare Kumar, all about helping HSPs find their own happy spaces. Clare is a force of nature.
Now, as you longtime readers know, I’m not exactly a shrinking violet. I’m always eager to talk (until the cows come home) about residential or business organizing, time management, Evernote, and everything else from notebooks to toxic productivity.
But the NAPO Stand Out Podcast was a different kettle of fish. One of its main audiences includes thousands of my professional organizing colleagues. This wasn’t a matter of talking to strangers who follow other people’s podcasts; this would be heard and seen by my peeps, including the professional organizing rock stars to whom I’ve looked up since I started my business.
The first-ever guest was Geralin Thomas, who is as fashionable as she is business-savvy, and has pivoted to training the next generation of organizing stars. The guest the week before I was set to appear was Harold Taylor, an absolute pioneer of time management and author of numerous books, including the seminal Making Time Work for You
Ask Paper Doll: Do I Really Need A Safe Deposit Box?
This is part of a recurring series of Ask Paper Doll posts where you can get your burning organizing questions answered by Paper Doll, a 20-year veteran professional organizer and amateur goofball.
Dear Paper Doll:
I finally feel like a grown-up. I’ve read your blog long enough to know what papers I’m supposed to have. I’ve learned not to put things awaiting action on the front of the fridge, and how to put away my financial files. But my Boomer parents keep telling me that I should have a safe deposit box. Do I really need one? Can’t I just buy a home safe? And if I do need one, what should I put in it that I can’t just keep in my files or my wallet?
Signed,
Boxed-In About Adulting
First, I’m glad to know that readers are paying attention to the advice I give in posts like How to Create, Organize, and Safeguard 5 Essential Legal and Estate Documents and The Professor and Mary Ann: 8 Other Essential Documents You Need To Create. (And yes, trade in the fridge door for a Tickler File and you’ll be much more productive.) You have all the prerequisites for a degree in adulting, so consider this topic an elective.
Let’s start with the basics, whether you even need (or should want) a safe deposit box. This is one of those issues that depends on your life and lifestyle.
Safe Deposit Boxes Photo by Tim Evans on Unsplash
CONSIDER GETTING A SAFE DEPOSIT BOX IF:
You want a completely private location in which to store and review your documents or possessions.
You want to keep track of where your vital documents are located and want them all in one central location, perhaps because you change apartments or living situations (in the same community) with frequency and don’t want to worry about the safety of these items.
You want your loved ones to have easy access to important documents even if you are unavailable (traveling, ill, etc.) and have designated a Power of Attorney or have arranged to have a trusted co-renter of the box.
You want to protect your important documents (and possibly other possessions, such as fine jewelry, coin collections, medals, photographs, and written or photo/video home inventories for insurance purposes) from theft, fire, flood or natural disaster. But remember, you still have to insure valuables, and there’s no guarantee the bank won’t be burgled or burned down.
You have family heirlooms and precious documents that are too fragile or delicate to be left in the open in a home where children, pets, and circumstances could cause damage.
You are concerned that if a fireproof home safe is light enough for you to take with you during a disaster, it would also be portable enough for thieves to carry away into the night. Also, you recognize that they keys or combinations to home safes are much easier for thieves to crack than getting through brick-and-mortar bank security.
Stock Certificate Image by pictavio from Pixabay
So, maybe you’ve got stock certificates, Great Grandma’s diamond earrings, a collection of gold coins, or a bunch of rare baseball cards. Banks have video cameras and alarm systems, fire-protection and sprinkler systems, and high-tech locks; the vaults in which the safe deposit boxes are ensconced are reinforced and secured, designed to withstand not only bandits but natural disasters like wildfires, floods, tornadoes and hurricanes. Do you need or want that level of security?
SKIP GETTING A SAFE DEPOSIT BOX IF:
You relocate cities with frequency, whether due to work, family, academic, or volunteer obligations.
You aren’t sure you’ll be able to afford the ongoing safe deposit box rental prices. (Yes, you can just remove the items from box, but why start a system unless you’ve got a plan for keeping up with it?)
The main things you’d keep in a safe deposit box are things you might need to access quickly and urgently. Banks are closed on Sundays, most of Saturdays, evenings, and holidays. During the first year of COVID, many branches had limited hours, and some closed altogether, directing patrons elsewhere. You can cash a check at a bank branch down the street; you can’t retrieve items from your box at Branch A by going to Branch B.
You prefer to live off the grid and don’t want “The Man” to know where you are or what documents you possess.
The documents you’d keep in the safe deposit box would be copies, not originals, and you’re comfortable with scanning documents to the cloud or to a flash drive or hard drive. (If you’re not that worried about fire, flood or theft and have few vital documents and no collections, you may be willing to chance the cost of replacement fees.)
If any of these apply to you, a portable, fireproof, waterproof safe might satisfy your needs. However, as noted above, they can be stolen or safe-cracked. Be clear on your own situation.
WHAT YOU SHOULD/COULD KEEP IN A SAFE DEPOSIT BOX
Silver Safe Deposit Boxes Photo by olieman.eth on Unsplash
Your safe deposit box is a good place to store difficult (but not necessarily impossible) to replace items that you don’t need to access often.
- VIPs — Keep the originals of your very important papers specific to someone’s status as a human, like: birth certificates, adoption papers, marriage licenses, divorce decrees, citizenship papers, and death certificates. Consider keeping your Social Security card in your safe deposit box, too. (Either way, never, ever keep your Social Security card in your wallet! If it’s stolen, it’s like losing a one million dollar bill in terms of the potential for identity theft.) These documents can be replaced, but not quickly or without cost.
- Military records and discharge papers — for example, DD 214s. These documents may be required when applying for post-military jobs and for getting veterans-related benefits. If you’re not job-hunting or the veteran has not just passed away, quick access isn’t likely to be needed and a safe deposit box is a great, secure location.
- Copies (but not the originals, and not the sole copies) of your will, Power of Attorney, and Healthcare Proxy (Medical Power of Attorney) documents.
- The deed to your house and any other property you own. Similarly, it can be helpful to store settlement papers, property and title surveys, and other real estate documents you don’t want to lose in a household kerfuffle.
- The titles to your vehicles, boats, planes, space shuttles, etc.
- Paper certificates for any stocks or bond you own, including US savings bonds. Most stocks and bonds are held electronically these days, so don’t worry if you don’t have the certificates. (Digital shares are called book-entry shares; they aren’t fancy and calligraphied, but it’s easier to keep track of them.)
- A printed or digital home inventory. This may be as simple as a spreadsheet or as detailed as a combination video and electronic documents. You’ll want multiple copies kept safe in case you need to file a claim with your homeowner’s or renter’s insurance policy.)
- Printed or digital copies of important documents for your business, including contracts and other vital records.
- Any documents you consider private and/or sensitive that you wouldn’t want your kids, neighbors, houseguests, cleaning service, or other random people to find. This could be copies of a deposition from a divorce, ugly correspondence you are keeping as legal proof, or anything that would make for a juicy Lifetime movie of the week.
- Jewelry and collectibles — BUT ONLY IF THEY ARE INSURED! The FDIC doesn’t insure the contents of your box; that’s your responsibility. Don’t plan on keeping your entire jewelry collection in a bank’s vault unless you are the queen of a small nation. Just store pieces you wear on very special occasions or those you’re saving for the next generation.
- Family keepsakes you want to protect from toddlers, pets, or other potentially damaging sources.
- Any other documents or small items that would be hard or expensive to replace, and for which the bank seems safer than your own living space.
- Hard drives and/or flash drives, with mountable backups of your computer or important data.
WHAT YOU SHOULD NEVER KEEP IN A SAFE DEPOSIT BOX
- Large amounts of cash — Sometimes, it’s all about the Benjamins, but not when you’re looking at a safe deposit box.
I get it; the bank already has tons of cash lying around, so why wouldn’t it be smart to keep all your money hanging with its little green friends? There are a few reasons.
First, your cash won’t be earning any interest, and even if we weren’t experiencing an inflationary period, you’re wasting the incredible opportunity value of compound interest!
Second, as I noted, safe deposit boxes can’t be accessed on weekends, holidays, or after hours, so you’ll be limited as to when you can lay your hands on your cash. If you’ve got this much cash and want to keep it so liquid that you’re not willing to invest it in stocks, bonds, mutual funds, CDs, or retirement funds, at least keep it in a savings or checking account you can access, 24/7, with a debit card or transfer from online banking!
Third, hard, cold cash (and any other assets) that you keep in a safe deposit box (rather than a bank account) won’t be protected by the Federal Deposit Insurance Corp., nor covered under FDIC rules. Deposit cash in your bank account and it’s insured up to $250,000 per depositor per bank. However, plunk cash into in your safe deposit box and it isn’t insured at all!
Yes, currency in your safe deposit box is less likely to catch on fire, get stolen, or be accidentally donated than if you stuffed it in your mattress. But there’s little worse you can keep in your box.
- Your will — What’s possibly worse that keeping cash in your safe deposit box? Keeping the only legal copy of your will. Unless you’ve arranged for a co-renter, someone with signature access to the box and who knows where the key is, your family will be out of luck if you pass away.
Last Will and Testament Photo by Melinda Gimpel on Unsplash
Your loved ones would have to secure a court order to access the will and other contents of the box, and that requires the costly services of an attorney. Your attorney should keep the official copy, and other copies can be kept on file at home, with your executor, and/or in the cloud. While we’re at it…
- Original, sole copies of vital documents that your family might need if you become incapacitated — If you’re the only person with access to your safe deposit box and you have not designated someone as having Power of Attorney (or stored the only existing copy of the Power of Attorney paperwork in the box), lack of access to originals of your living will/medical directives and other life or end-of-life instructions could create a nightmare.
- Your passport, if there’s ANY chance you’ll need it urgently — Do you (or might you) work for a company that will require you to go abroad on a moment’s notice? Are you an international spy? (OK, I know, you can’t tell me if you are.) You probably figure that you would know if you’d ever need your passport urgently.
But trust Paper Doll; just because you’ve never needed your passport urgently in the past, doesn’t mean there aren’t a number of reasons you might in the future.
Back in February 2020, in Paper Doll on Narwhals, Fake News, and How To Get a REAL ID, I explained that by the 4th Quarter of 2020, everyone would need a REAL ID (driver’s license with star logo or a passport) to fly, or to enter federal buildings (to give testimony or participate in legal procedings in a federal courthouse) or nuclear facilities. (Hear that, Homer Simpson?)
Due to COVID, that date has been pushed a few times, and is now rescheduled to May 3, 2023.
Maybe you’ve never used your passport before, or perhaps never used it without planning a trip 6 months in advance. But is it possible that you’ll have your wallet stolen the week before a domestic trip and your passport will be your only alternative?
Or might you need to enter a federal building (for perfectly legal, rational, wouldn’t-mind-being-seen-on-the-news-doing-so reasons)? Could an elderly relative get injured while on vacation in Europe or your college-age kid get sick while on Spring Break in Jamaica and you’d have to fly internationally at a moment’s notice? Consider the possibilities before putting your passport in the box.
- Uninsured valuables — Yes, your jewelry and collectibles are probably safer at the bank than in your rental apartment, house, or nursing home. But make sure you notify your insurance company so they attach a value-appropriate rider to your homeowner’s or renter’s policy.
- Spare keys — Dude! If you lock your keys in the car or lock yourself out of the house, it’s probably not going to be during banker’s hours! Think of the person you trust most in the world; now ask yourself if your mother (or MY mother) would trust that person. If you’d trust them to drive your car or babysit your kids, that’s a good indicator of someone to whom you can give a spare key.
- Anything illegal — You shouldn’t need Paper Doll to tell you this, but don’t put stolen goods, fireworks, drugs, toxic or hazardous substances, or anything that’s a no-go with the law.
HOW TO GET A SAFE DEPOSIT BOX
Before you rent a safe deposit box, figure out everything you’re going to want to keep in it. Gather everything up and lay it out someplace safe from the prying, sticky hands tiny humans (or furry friends), like on your dining table or in the guest room.
Knowing how much you have will help you determine how large a box to get. Rental rates of vary by size, as well as by bank or credit union, region of the country, and other factors, and can range from as little as $20 to several hundred dollars per year, so don’t “over-rent” on the space you need.
Box depths are standard (generally about 18-22 inches), but height and width dimensions vary. The smallest boxes are usually 3″ x 5″, but unless you have very few documents, you’d have to roll your papers to make them fit. Medium boxes range from 3″ x 10″ to 10″ x 10″. The largest safe deposit boxes in consumer banks and credit unions tend to be about 15″ x 15″, though larger specialty boxes can be arranged at banks that cater to clients who have large financial holdings.
Select a bank branch convenient to your home or work. Don’t quibble over a few dollars if you’ll have to schlep across town. Consider when you’ll want to access the box, either for retrieval or for putting items in.
Ask about policies and fees. What are the key replacement fees? Charges for drilling boxes if keys are lost? (Safe deposit box keys are TINY! Put them somewhere safe and where you’ll remember to find them!) Is there comfortable (or any) seating available in the vault, in case you need time to go through the contents of your box and need to sort documents?
Think carefully about whether you want to share access with a co-renter, like your your spouse, parent(s), adult child(ren), business partner(s) or friend(s). You can’t just designate someone as a co-owner and give them a key. They’ll have to sign the signature card and show photo ID both at the time of rental and to gain access.
Remember, if you don’t have a co-renter, your Power of Attorney designee can act on your behalf for financial and other urgent matters and can access the box for you, but PoA designations cease upon your death. Eventually, the executor of your will can gain access (depending on the probate and estate procedures of your state), but this can be a lengthy process. If your possessions and documents are relatively simple, you’re probably better off naming as co-renter someone (like Paper Mommy) in which you can place great trust.
Make an appointment to rent and “move into” your box. Be prepared to fill out some forms, sign a lease agreement, and pay for the initial rental term. Make sure co-renters are available to come to the appointment as well.
Bring your photo ID. Co-renters? Samesies!
Bring the items you wish to store. Before you leave the house or office, create an inventory list, and bring a copy of the list with you. As you place the items or documents in the box, check them off your list.
Take a photo of the items in the box. Take a photo and/or adjust your list whenever you add or remove documents or possessions.
Bring gallon-size zip-lock plastic bags for protecting items in case of floods or sprinkler system malfunctions. If your box is high enough, safeguard delicate non-flat items from water damage with plastic food containers. Put a your name and contact information inside the container so that items can be identified as yours in the aftermath of any disaster.
Keep your key somewhere safe and memorable.
Don’t be like my dad. When we emptied out his office, as I described in The Great Mesozoic Law Office Purge of 2015: A Professional Organizer’s Family Tale, we found an envelope with my father’s familiar scrawl in red ink: “This is the envelope for the key to Eva’s safe deposit box in Miami, which we closed.” Eva was Paper Mommy‘s mother; she died in 2001. He would never have been able to find the envelope if the key had been needed, but kept an empty envelope telling us where the key had been!
Even if someone unauthorized has your key, they won’t be able to access your safe deposit box, as proof of identification and signature is required in tandem with a key. Key loss, however, may require drilling of the box — and that can be pricey!
REMINDERS AND CONSIDERATIONS
Possessions can be damaged or stolen. Faulty sprinkler systems, actual fires, floods and yes, even bank robberies, can lead to loss or damage of your items. So maintain an inventory at home of the contents of your safe deposit box, just as you might keep a home inventory of your possessions in the box.
The contents of your box will NOT be available 24/7/365. There’s a reason they’re called bankers’ hours — generally 8a – 5p, Monday through Friday, with some wiggle room on Saturday mornings and occasional late Friday hours. Don’t put something in the box that you might need to access quickly or urgently.
Access to your safe deposit box can be frozen. The IRS can block your access if you’re in a dispute with them. If law enforcement officials (including the Department of Homeland Security) believe you and/or the contents of the box are related to illegal activity (drugs, guns, explosives, or stolen items), a court order can be issued to give law enforcement access to the contents of your box.
Your safe deposit box can be declared “abandoned” — If you stop paying your rental fee, don’t maintain communication with the bank, and nobody in your family or overseeing your estate knows you had a safe deposit box, the contents of the box will eventually be turned over to your state’s Unclaimed Property division. Make sure your loved ones or legal representatives know you have a box, where it is, and the location of the key.
On the Road Again: Organize Your Mobile Office
Road Warrior Image by Mohamed Hassan from Pixabay
During the last two years, the watchword has been “work from home.” In this recent WFH era, we’ve eschewed office buildings and turned snuggly corners of our bedrooms and dining rooms into home offices. Many companies have closed their local operations altogether, finally trusting that there’s no need to micromanage their knowledge-worker staffs. More and more, companies are OK with letting people work where and how they operate best.
Of course, this isn’t the case with everyone. Some employers are rushing at breakneck speed to return the North American workplace experience to “normal,” despite the distinct rise in European and Asian COVID cases of the Omicron BA.2 subvariant. Count me as one of those who is curmudgeonly aghast at the state-by-state dropping of precautions, as I noted in the following reply to a friend, which got a lot of Twitter love.
I am so tired of people saying it’s over because they want it to be over. It’s not a relationship, it’s a virus.
— Julie Bestry, CPO® (@ProfOrganizer) March 23, 2022
Obviously, though, there are some people who can’t work from home. Your favorite restaurant can’t let the sous-chef work from his back deck. An OB-GYN is the perfect example of how you can’t phone in every kind of delivery!
And people who travel about for work, whose very career depends on them physically arriving at different locations, whether locally, regionally, nationally, or internationally, need to get on the road (or the tarmac), however ambivalent they might feel about the prospect. And, of course, they need to be organized.
HOW TO ORGANIZE YOUR MOBILE OFFICE
From smart phones to Zoom to cloud computing, modern technology has made road warriors a little less embattled, but keeping your mobile office from looking like an outtake from Game of Thrones battle requires some special equipment and finesse.
Over twenty years as a professional organizer, I have worked with a wide variety of clients who work, at least some of the time, from the road.
There have been numerous pharmaceutical sales representatives who needed to organize medical literature, promotional materials, medication samples, durable medical goods, and anatomical models and schlep them from medical offices and hospitals in their assigned local or regional areas. I’ve worked with a few mobile pharmacists serving as pharmacy supervisors, traveling each week to different outlets, and working both as members of their profession and in consultant/supervisory capacities on behalf of their companies.
I had one client who traveled her “territories” in various parts of the country for a restaurant chain, training franchisees and their staff on everything from computer systems to how to prepare and garnish certain delicious foodstuffs. And one client shared memorable tales of his experiences as a high-level insurance executive assigned to travel and review high profile claims.
What all of these hearty folks had in common is that they needed to have all of their necessary office supplies, documents, and resources available to them with the same ease of accessibility as when they were comfortably seated in actual offices. While each had unique needs, their were a wide number of commonalities.
In the Car
Let’s focus on documents. Back at a decidedly stationary office, you’d have filing cabinets, hanging file drawers in a desk, and a variety of other options with the distinct advantage that you never need worry about jostling.
Cars, however, jostle. They are buffeted by the wind on the highway and hit unanticipated bumps from potholes and running over detritus that has fallen off of other vehicles.
If your mobile office requires bringing lots of glossy literature, forms, or other pre-printed material, you’ll want to approximate a standard filing system as much as possible.
Personally, I’m a fan of sturdy file crates. These crates, fashioned after old-school milk crates but with file rails on all four sides (to accommodate letter-sized or legal-sized files) take a licking and keep on ticking when you’ve got a heavy load of hanging files filled with file folders and lots of paper.
My favorite version is made by Sterilite and, like the very best versions of the TARDIS’s control room, has lots of “round things.” I own them in four different shades of pink/plum/mauve, plus blues and blacks. Another client swears by teal.
In most “big box” stores like Target or Walmart or office supply stores, you can usually fine single crates for $5-10. (Storex makes a very similar version, with weirder displays of “round things,” but usually only in packs of three or more for somewhat higher prices.)
Paper Doll’s Pop Culture Guide to Decluttering with Your Valentine
Happy Valentine’s Day. Today’s post is an updated reworking of a classic Paper Doll post from 2015.
When your Valentine presents you with a gift box, whether packaged in classic Tiffany Blue or wrapped in lopsided, awkwardly taped, Sunday comics pages, your heart warms. When love fills your heart, and a gift fills your outstretched hands, it’s the thought that counts.
Tiffany box photo by tommao wang on Unsplash
But other times, the people you love present you with clutter, like a pet presenting you with a previously-living mouse, and just the thought of it can add a layer of permafrost around the warmest of hearts.
As a professional organizer, I often work with clients whose efforts are not helped — or worse, are sabotaged — by their spouses or significant others. Here’s a sampling of tips to help encourage your sweetheart to join the organizing process without either of you being tempted toward tears or tantrums.
PURGE THE JUDGMENT AND TOSS THE GUILT
Start by remembering that disorganization isn’t a character flaw. It’s not a measure of your sweetie’s maturity, intellect, or innate worth. (And being organized isn’t a measure of these things either, any more than dancing or culinary skills.)
By and large, unless we’re discussing legal concerns, financial issues, or personal safety (where a disorganized kitchen turns into a case for Tyvek-suited folks from the Centers for Disease Control), organizing is rarely a matter of right vs. wrong, but one of effective vs. ineffective.
It’s just a mismatch between the skills and systems already in place and the ever-changing demands of the world, including your demands (ahem, expectations) of your loved one.
Making people feel guilty about their clutter doesn’t help — and indeed, it can hurt their self-esteem and the loving bonds you share. Instead, create a guilt-free environment in which both getting organized and being organized can be seen as beneficial, fun and easy.
CATEGORIZE THE PURPOSE: START SPEAKING THE SAME LANGUAGE
While this is a Valentine-y week, I think we can all agree that organizing is not a particularly romantic conversational topic. Short of sorting the candy box so that you get your caramels and your significant other gets all the cherry-filled bon-bons, talking about organizing is about as romantic as planning who will clean the bathroom and checking off expenses while filing your taxes.
While the organizing isn’t going to make anyone think “hubba hubba,” life once you are organized is more relaxed and enjoyable, and that is, obviously, more conducive to romance.
Moving forward depends on making sure you start from the same place. Perhaps you’re aware of The 5 Love Languages, starting with the book by Gary Chapman?
For example, you may know that your love language is “acts of service” and suspect your spouse’s love language is “words of affirmation.” Meanwhile, your honeybunny doesn’t have a clue about that and feels like Captain Picard relaying the Epic of Gilgamesh while trying to learn the metaphors of Tamarian before it’s too late.
As an aside, for those unfamiliar, Star Trek’s Tamarians spoke entirely in metaphors related to heroic archetypes. Meanwhile, references to this episode, Darmok, have become symbolic of all the memes that reference all the memes.
I saw these awhile back, more or less pointing out the same thing! pic.twitter.com/NpEWAv0G1n
— Dana McKiernan (@UnlikelyLass) October 24, 2020
My point? You’re going to have to get on the same page and tell your loved one that for the two of you to face the beast at Tanagra (a common foe) you’re going to have to become Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra (and work together).
Start by making sure you both understand what it means to be organized, and why it’s important to get organized.
For example, visual appeal just isn’t a huge motivator for many individuals. If someone is not already actively concerned with how things look, feeling pushed to declutter merely to make the house “pretty” is often a deal-breaker.
Instead of aesthetics, focus on the major tangible, temporal, and experiential benefits of getting organized. Discuss how some new skills and systems will help the family save money (which can be better spent on nifty items and meaningful experiences).
Show your sweetheart how the clutter of too many things in various locations (rather than in unified, categorized, even *labeled* storage) means it’s hard to find things, and how, when things are difficult to find, we tend to buy duplicates and triplicates.
Reflect upon how disorganization often means missing deadlines (for filing taxes, returning rented items, paying bills, etc.), thereby causing you to have to pay fines and fees, or pay higher prices when coupons or discounts have expired.
Explore how a few organizing tweaks may also save time. If cluttered possessions make it hard to find everything from a clean shirt to the phone charger to the invitation to a wedding you’re attending, it’s slowing you down, giving you, your spouse, and the family less time to focus on doing the things you actually enjoy.
If disorganization is causing you anxiety, explain that to your loved one, too, and approach it without blame. If you can clarify that cluttered paperwork and passwords for handling your finances makes you feel uneasy about the future, that shared clarity gives you a starting point for discussion.
Let your beloved know that you don’t see the time spent organizing as the goal, per se, but as a way to get to the goal of having more personal and family fun time.
Show your spouse or significant other the way organization (at home, at work, and for special events and activities) can reduce stress and increase overall productivity.
IDENTIFY THE CHALLENGES SO YOU CAN MAKE ORGANIZING EASIER
Once you’ve developed a common language and goals, brainstorm together how you can make the process easier. Ask your darling what makes participating in the current system difficult in the first place.
Obstacle #1: The Where
Does your sweetie leave a phone charger, wallet, keys, pocket change and clothing in little piles all over the kitchen, living room and bedroom? Does your dearie feel like there’s no place or space designated just for him or her?
Perhaps the solution is as simple as figuring out what spaces would be convenient for each (a valet hook inside the closet, a bowl and charging block on a table in the entry nook, above a drawer designated just for them) and declaring them official!
Are they putting things down instead of putting things away because they don’t want to be “made wrong” by storing something where they think you’ll say it doesn’t belong? Do they cringe at the prospect of feeling clueless or being corrected? (And can you acknowledge that, in pursuit of a more organized space at home, you have fallen into the habit of nagging parent instead of helpmate?)
Find ways to be equal partners, instead. Make decisions together, and then label the spaces so everyone feels empowered to put things away.
Ask your beloved if there are current storage areas that aren’t convenient — places where items are housed that don’t feel logical, or aren’t easily accessed — and rethink the placement. Perhaps the labels for the family filing system aren’t as intuitive as you think, leading to paperwork procrastination?
Everything should have a home, and if the storage place is conveniently located and labeled, it makes it easier to put things away.
Paint an outline of the tools that go on the pegboard in the garage to make it simpler to return them.
Work together to label family financial, legal and medical files, or label the edges of shelves in the linen closet so everyone knows where twin sheet sets should go.
If you or your sweetie is artistic, sketch a fun little map of where foods belong in the fridge or pantry and post it on the door.
Obstacle #2: The When
Is “when?” more of a problem than “where?” Does your spouse or significant other just not remember to do the tasks because of “clutter blindness?” If visual triggers don’t work, what about a cell phone alarm at certain times of the day, with ring tones of songs that are funny or keyed to the task at hand?
Is time more of an obstacle than memory? Build time into the family schedule (perhaps a nightly 15 minutes before dinner, or mid-morning on Saturdays) for everyone (kids and grownups who act like kids, alike), to tackle their organizing tasks and brainstorm solutions to frequent annoyances.
Obstacle #3: The How
Even when you agree on the destination, it’s easy for you and your special someone to disagree on the journey.
Perhaps one of you came from a background where each person was assigned a set of chores (possibly based on now-outdated gender expectations) while the other was taught to pay attention to all the undone tasks and address them immediately.
An un-filed bank statement? Groceries not put away? An empty toilet paper tube not replaced with a fresh roll? To your mind, whose job is this? This is such a common refrain that the TV show Everybody Loves Raymond created an entire episode over whose job it was to unpack and put away a suitcase.
The person who was trained to recognize unfinished tasks can easily become frustrated and (understandably) feel like they’re doing all the work, while the person who grew up with an expectation of only having to do “assigned” tasks may not understand that in an adult relationship, there is no parent or person in charge — that having to play that role is exhausting — and no one person should have to assign tasks to the other in an equal partnership.
For this kind of “how” problem, it’s helpful to circle back to the “same language” conversation, and study up on concepts like “mental load” and “emotional labor.” Consider reading articles or books on the topic, like Dr. Regina Lark and Judith Kolberg’s Emotional Labor: Why A Woman’s Work is Never Done and What To Do About It.
Ask Paper Doll: Should I Organize My Space and Time with Color?
This is part of a recurring series of Ask Paper Doll posts where you can get your burning organizing questions answered by Paper Doll, a 20-year veteran professional organizer and amateur goofball.
Dear Paper Doll:
It’s only January and I’m already at a loss for motivation. I’ve been thinking about using color to organize my office and maybe my calendar, but the more I look at my options, the more overwhelmed I get. How can I organize by color and not constantly be tinkering with my systems and remembering what color goes where?
Signed,
Feeling grey with a case of the blues
Grey sky, grey streets, grey mood? Even if we weren’t in the second winter of a pandemic, January is a tough month to feel sparkly. We’re still nine weeks away from Daylight Saving Time, so our late afternoons are dark and gloomy. Plus, after the ongoing glow of holidays from late November through New Year’s Day, of course you’re feeling a loss of spark.
And yes, color is a great way to pump up the mood. If color weren’t so vital, Pantone wouldn’t be known worldwide for coming up with its color of the year. By the way, Paper Doll is a huge fan of this year’s color, Very Peri.
But organizing by color and organizing with color can be very different things.
ORGANIZING BY COLOR
Some people are enthusiastic about using color to organize everything in their homes, offices, and lives. Maybe they have a signature color that serves as a personal brand; others believe in color-coding and sorting everything by hue. Paper Doll isn’t necessarily keen on that. Using color to decide where something goes and with which it is grouped depends on the situation.
Organizing clothing or shoes by color? Sure. Imagine you have all of your long-sleeved shirts hanging in the closet, in roughly ROY-G-BIV color order, or group all your black pumps together, then the blue, then the red, and so-on within your collection of heels.
This will make it easy to recognize you’ve tipped the scale toward full-on goth when you’ve got 17 black turtlenecks, or may be mistaken for Dorothy if most of your shoes are ruby red. Sorting and ordering your clothes and shoes by color makes sense, but probably as a secondary sorting characteristic within clothing/shoe types.
Organizing your calendar by color? Absolutely! Whether you grab a selection of pretty markers to fill in your paper planner (medical appointments in red, billing or tax dates in green, social events in purple) or use the settings in Outlook, Gmail, or any other digital calendar, you can color-code to your heart’s delight.
And the best thing? If you select the wrong color, you don’t need white-out or an eraser to fix it. One little click, and you’re back in business!
Organizing files by color? Mayyyyyyyybe. I hate to sound coy, but the effectiveness of a system based on color-coding files depends on the level of commitment of the user.
In the abstract, it can be great to organize your files (either tabbed folders or hanging folders) by color. Figure out what your overarching categories are, and assign colors to those categories, whether in your reference or action files. For example:
- Red folders — Urgent tasks or information you always need to get your hands on in a hurry
- Green folders — Financial information related to taxes, payable accounts, and investments
- Blue folders — Planning, like for vacations or work projects
- Yellow folders — Client information or class materials
- Purple folders — Creative tasks
and so on. Color (as we’ll see below) stirs emotions, creates enthusiasm and motivation, and triggers action. What could be better?
The problem isn’t with the system, per se, but with the users. If you let yourself run out of yellow folders just as you sign on a new client, what will you do? Are you likely to order new folders in that color scheme right away? If so, you’re set. If not, you may let a pile of papers related to that client languish in the corner of your desk, risking them getting mislaid or lost.
Plus, keeping many different boxes of colored tabbed folders can be expensive and get out of balance quickly. You may use three times as many purple folders as red ones and your red box may sit year after year, mostly untouched.
If you want to embrace color, there are a few other options beyond a full-on color-coding assault. You could:
- Pick your favorite color, and use those tabbed folders exclusively.
- Start with just two or three of your most used categories and pick colors to define each of those. You’ll still be using color as a sort of trigger or label, as above, but you won’t be going “whole hog,” at least not at the beginning.
- Use plain manilla tabbed folders, but pick a beloved color for hanging folders. (Because hanging folders hold tabbed folders, and can generally accommodate three-in-one, we don’t run out of them as quickly.) Traditional olive/army green hanging folders aren’t likely to cheer anyone up, and using a fun hanging folder uniformly through your filing system will brighten your mood without requiring you to keep up with a complex system.
(These purple Smead hanging folders are bright and bold, and are available in most Big Box stores and at Amazon for $17.89 for a box of 25.)
Organizing your spices by color? How experienced a chef are you that you could catch yourself before you added a visibly similar (but wrong) spice to a recipe? Ground nutmeg, cloves, and cinnamon look alike; but would you want to risk grabbing the wrong one and making iced nutmeg rolls or clove-raisin coffee cake?
Are you willing to mistake similarly-red cayenne pepper for paprika? Perhaps it’s better to group spices by the categories of usage (baking tasks vs. preparing meat/vegetables, etc.). SpiceAdvice has a nice Quick Reference Spice Chart sorted by usage categories.
Organizing your books by color? Oh, gracious. This question has stirred quite a bit of controversy over the last few years. I mean, there’s this person:
I feel like coordinating books by color is one of those things you either love or are wrong about. pic.twitter.com/U6GfIZLgnQ
— Jennifer Wright (@JenAshleyWright) July 15, 2020
I’d take umbrage, but I’m too busy worried about how cold her legs must be.
And then there’s Clea Shearer and Joanna Teplin from the Netflix program Get Organized with the Home Edit. They’re known for their passion for color-coding, and they did that with a few bookshelves on their show. But they were children’s books, and let’s face it, the way tiny humans pull books off shelves, it’s not like alphabetized books are going to stay that way. (Their background, at the above link, shows a full set of bookshelves for grownups arranged by color. I’m looking around for my fainting couch.)
Magazines have been rife with headlines in favor of organizing books by color. For example, Jezebel ran with a piece called Sorry, Color-Coded Bookshelves Look Good, while Slate stood up for the design-oriented folks with Arranging Your Books By Color Is Not a Moral Failure.
Of course, in this highly competitive media market, every online magazine’s job is to stir controversy and curry clicks. Thus, I suspect these headlines recognize that those of us who read may care more about the content of our books than using them as decor and are trying to drive some righteous indignation clicks to their sites.
But Paper Doll stands firmly in the NOPE category on organizing books by hue. The color of a book’s cover is about marketing; it was almost certainly chosen by a marketing team based on the designs in fashion for that genre during that season. The color may not even have been approved by the author or seem to make sense. I mean, even early versions of Alice Walker’s The Color Purple didn’t have a purple book cover or spine!
I’m a practical person. I believe that function should always come before form. A gorgeous outfit that doesn’t cover all your fleshy bits and gives you frostbite? Nuh-uh. A bookshelf that requires you to remember the color of the cover vs. letting you just walk over to peruse the category (fiction? organizing? recipes?) or authors? I can’t countenance that.
I’m not saying you can’t do it; I’m saying I can’t advise it.
And that’s because, as a professional organizer, my role is to help you live a more organized and productive life. Sure, I’ll leave your space looking better than it did before, but my reason for being in your space is to leave it working better than it did before.
ORGANIZING WITH COLOR
So, what’s the difference?
Organizing by color requires creating a system. With clothes or shoes, it might just be ROY-G-BIV and keeping things in order. When you put away your clothes, as you approach with a freshly-laundered shirts on hangers, you’ll be able to put away each item in the general color order. It’s your closet, so you don’t have to be too persnickety unless Vogue is coming to do a photo layout of your walk-in, in which case, good for you!
With file folders, as described above, organizing by color requires a stricter system. In effect, you’re deciding, up front, what all of your categories will be and assigning colors to those categories. You have to be willing to stop, each time you create a folder, to consider what category the contents of the folder belong to, and select that color every time. If you’re comfortable with that, then you have my blessing. I just don’t want to see you get stressed out.
You also have to be relatively sure that you’ll “feel” this association going forward (unless you’re just having fun and don’t care whether there’s a cognitive connection between your colors and your categories); if you soon realize that you hate the color orange but have assigned orange to your accounts payable, you might stop filing your paid bills or (eek!) avoid paying them altogether.
Organizing by color can be great, and I’m absolutely in favorite of it, as long as you, as an individual, feel comfortable sticking to a system. If not, that’s OK. There are still magnificent ways to organize your life with color, without adhering to strict or narrow categories.
Organizing with color lets you pick functional objects that add a pop of color but don’t require a lot of mental or physical effort to maintain.
It’s more thematic than systematic.
It’s sort of how we talked about about goals and resolutions vs. picking a word of the year. (If you haven’t read Review & Renew for 2022: Resolutions, Goals, and Words of the Year, this is a great time to help you get back on that motivation kick!) Goals — and the habits we embrace to achieve them — are like the systems for organizing by color; a word, mantra, or theme of the year, rather, provides a sense of focus, and color can do that for you.
Pantone does it with the color of the year; you can brand yourself, or your year, with color that’s meaningful to you! Think, “2022 in Royal Blue!” (Good luck rhyming a year with periwinkle or burnt sienna, though.)
Let’s get a sense of what color psychology tells us. Our friends at Quill created a nifty explanation to help explain some of the meanings of color in “Color Code Your Way to an Organized Workspace with Office Products.”
Do you have to use the specific colors that are associated with specific feelings? Of course not. I don’t particularly find the color yellow to be “associated with hope, happiness, and positivity.” I don’t even buy the original yellow Post-it® Notes because yellow just doesn’t do it for me. (I’m so into pinks and purples, as you might have guessed.)
But do experiment and take advantage of the aspects of the psychology of color to make your space your own.
A FEW FUN WAYS TO INTRODUCE COLOR INTO YOUR LIFE THIS SEASON
Our friends at Time Timer have come up with some gorgeous, new colorful timers.
First, they’ve released their original 8″ timers in Learning Center Classroom Sets (of 3) in two different color schemes. But you don’t need to be using them in a classroom to brighten up your office or workspace. There’s a primary color set:
and a secondary color set:
These sets are priced (for pre-order) at $104/set. Again, these are designed for learning activities, but there’s no reason why you couldn’t have one timer in your office, one in your kitchen, and one in your workout area.
Each set comes with three Original 8″ visual timers (for up to a 60-minute duration) with magnetic backs and fold-up feet, three dry erase cards for labeling the current activity (great for helping you focus during a 25-minute pomodoro task), and one free download of the Time Timer Desktop App.
They’re also selling a Time Timer MOD® – Special Edition Tie-Dye version (for pre-order) for $36.95. I’m a big fan of the little MODs, and this 3 1/2″ square MOD provides a tiny pop of color while helping you visualize time passing, and keep you motivated to accomplish your tasks.
For a burst of color for office supplies, consider Poppin desk, wall, and office accessories:
You can buy their products directly from the Poppin website, or at Staples, Quill, and The Container Store. Be sure to check out Poppin’s Work From Home section for more fun, motivating bursts of color.
Do you like to wrap yourself up in color or just use it for accents?
Are you comfortable with intricate color-coding systems, or do you just want to surround yourself with your favorite hues?
And what’s your favorite color?
Meet me in the comments and tell all!
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