Archive for ‘General’ Category
Paper Doll’s Geeky Organizing Love: 6 Tips To Declutter With Your Darling
When your Valentine presents you with a gift box, whether packaged in classic Tiffany Blue or wrapped in lopsided, awkwardly taped, Sunday comics pages, your heart warms. When love fills your heart, and a gift fills your outstretched hands, it’s the thought that counts. But other times, the people you love present you with clutter, like a pet presenting you with a deceased mouse or squirrel, and just the thought of it can add a wintry layer of permafrost around the warmest of hearts.
As a professional organizer, I often work with clients whose efforts are not helped — or worse, are sabotaged — by their spouses or significant others. Here are a sampling of tips to help you help your sweetheart join in the organizing process in your home without tears or tantrums.
1) PURGE THE JUDGMENT AND TOSS THE GUILT
The first key to achieving organization as a joint effort is to remember that disorganization isn’t a character flaw. It’s not a measure of your sweetie’s maturity, intellect or worth. By and large, unless we’re discussing matters of legal concerns, financial issues, or personal safety (where a disorganized kitchen turns into a case for Tyvek-suited folks from the Centers for Disease Control), organizing is rarely a matter of right vs. wrong, but one of effective vs. ineffective.
It’s just a mismatch between the skills and systems already in place and the ever-changing demands of the world, including your demands (ahem, expectations) of your loved one.
Making people feel guilty about their clutter doesn’t help — and indeed, it can hurt their self-esteem and the loving bonds you share. Instead, create a guilt-free environment in which both getting organized and being organized can be seen as beneficial, fun and easy.
2) CATEGORIZE THE PURPOSE: START SPEAKING THE SAME LANGUAGE
With Valentine’s Day approaching, this is a romantic week, but organizing is not a particularly romantic conversational topic. Moving forward depends on making sure you start from the same place. Perhaps you’re aware of The Five Love Languages? You may know that your love language is “acts of service” and suspect your spouse’s love language is “words of affirmation.” Meanwhile, your honeybunny doesn’t have a clue about that and feels like Captain Picard relaying the Epic of Gilgamesh while trying to learn the metaphors of Tamarian before it’s too late.
You’re going to have to get on the same page and tell your loved one that for the two of you to face the beast at Tanagra (a common foe) you’re going to have to become Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra (and work together).
Start by making sure you both understand what it means to be organized, and why it’s important to get organized. For example, visual appeal just isn’t a huge motivator for many individuals. If someone is not already actively concerned with how things look, feeling pushed to declutter merely to make the house “pretty” is often a deal-breaker.
Instead of aesthetics, focus on the major tangible, temporal and experiential benefits of getting organized. Discuss how some new skills and systems will help the family save money (which can be better spent on nifty items and meaningful experiences). Show your sweetheart how the clutter of too many things in various locations (rather than in unified, categorized, even *labeled* storage) means it’s hard to find things, and how, when things are difficult to find, we tend to buy duplicates and triplicates. Reflect upon how disorganization often means missing deadlines (for filing taxes, returning rented items, paying bills, etc.), thereby causing you to have to pay fines and fees, or pay higher prices when coupons or discounts have expired.
Explore how a few organizing tweaks may also save time. If cluttered possessions make it hard to find everything from a clean shirt to the camera charger to the invitation to a wedding you’re attending, it’s slowing you down, giving you, your spouse and the family less time to focus on doing the things you actually enjoy.
If disorganization is causing you anxiety, explain that to your loved one, without blame. If you can clarify that cluttered paperwork and passwords for handling your finances makes you feel uneasy about the future, that shared clarity gives you a starting point for discussion.
Let your beloved know that you don’t see the time spent organizing as the goal, per se, but as a way to get to the goal of having more personal and family fun time.
Show your spouse the way organization (at home, at work, and for special events and activities) can reduce stress and increase overall productivity.
3) IDENTIFY THE CHALLENGES SO YOU CAN MAKE IT EASY
Next, brainstorm together how you can make the process easier. Ask your spouse what makes participating in the current system difficult in the first place.
Does your sweetie leave a phone charger, wallet, keys, pocket change and clothing in little piles all over the kitchen, living room and bedroom? Does your darling feel like there’s no place or space designated just for him or her? Perhaps the solution is as simple as figuring out what spaces would be convenient for each (a valet hook inside the closet, a bowl and charging block on a table in the entry nook, above a drawer designated just for them) and declaring them official!
Are they putting things down instead of putting things away because they don’t want to be “made wrong” by storing something where they think you’ll say it doesn’t belong? Do they cringe at the prospect of feeling clueless or being corrected?
Find ways to be equal partners, instead. Make decisions together, and then label the spaces so everyone feels empowered to put things away.
Ask your beloved if there are current storage areas that aren’t convenient – places where items are housed that don’t feel logical, or aren’t easily accessed – and rethink the placement. Perhaps the labels for the family filing system aren’t as intuitive as you think, leading to paperwork procrastination?
Everything should have a home, and if the storage place is conveniently located and labeled, it makes it easier to put things away.
Paint an outline of the tools that go on the pegboard in the garage to make it simpler to return them. Work together to label family financial, legal and medical files, or label the edges of shelves in the linen closet so everyone knows where twin sheet sets should go.
If you or your sweetie is artistic, sketch a fun little map of where foods belong in the fridge or pantry and post it on the door.
Is “when?” more of a problem than “where?” Does your spouse or significant other just not remember to do the tasks because of “clutter blindness?” If visual triggers don’t work, what about a cell phone alarm at certain times of the day, with ring tones of songs that are funny or keyed to the task at hand?
Is time an obstacle? Build time into the family schedule (perhaps a nightly 15 minutes before dinner, or mid-morning on Saturdays) for everyone (kids and grownups who act like kids, alike), to tackle their organizing tasks and brainstorm solutions to frequent annoyances.
4) MAKE IT FUN TO MAKE IT STICK
Research shows that we all have a limited amount of willpower, so instead of expecting one another to create and stick to new habits because they’re for the common good, create incentives for sticking to the new game plan.
In The Princess Bride, Westley acquiesced with a quiet “As you wish,” to Buttercup.
Once he was unmasked as the Dread Pirate Roberts and they were reunited, Buttercup (and we) learned that he wasn’t being passive-aggressive; it was his way of saying he loved her. However, if your beloved thinks of organizing as a chore, and thus procrastinates on promised clutter-busting tasks, leading to resentment on both sides, find ways to make behavioral changes an adventure, a challenge or a competition.
Appeal to the big kid inside and document successes with points or rewards. Encourage trying to beat a personal best. Consider a Seinfeldian “Don’t break the chain” effort at momentum. Just like companies have “152 days without an accident,” to avoid safety violations, you could have a kitschy whiteboard in the house keeping track of how many days your household has gone without the kids being late for school, or you having to bug one another to unload the dishwasher or put away the [laundry, gadgets, X-Box, etc.].
Once systems are in place, schedule organizing maintenance time daily and play funny music with silly lyrics to set the tone. If you have kids, you may have to listen to Let It Go for the millionth time, but if it’s just you and your sweetheart, fifteen minutes of 80s TV theme songs or some Weird Al Yankovic should do the trick.
If there are household and organizing tasks your sweetheart just can’t stand, why not make a trade? Nobody says you always have to unload the dishwasher and your partner must balance the checkbook. Exchange the least-desirable tasks and you might both gain motivation in new areas.
5) ACCEPT DIFFERING STANDARDS
Sometimes, the organizing issues between sweethearts has less to do with overcoming obstacles and identifying incentives, and more to do with what’s behind that lack of communication. To borrow from Star Trek again, some people come from a background of “Temba, his arms open,” (meaning “take or use this” — a gift) while others are more “Temba, at rest.” (where a gift has been refused or rebuffed).
In other words, some people prefer a lot of stuff around them, while others want a more streamlined or austere set-up. Your beloved’s dainty teacup collection is no less (and no more) worthy of consideration than your carefully curated 30-year-old Transformers action figures. But you have to agree on location, and keeping something on display comes with an obligation to care for it (and yes, people, that does mean dusting)!
If you came from a household where everything that wasn’t being used that minute was immediately put away, but your significant other came from one with more relaxed, cozy standards, it’s unreasonable to expect the other person to bend to your desires all the time.
For areas where compromise isn’t acceptable to the partner who wants things to be more than functionally organized but also fit a very specific aesthetic, recognize that this is not your honey’s “flaw” for you to correct. If you want to keep seven decorative pillows on the bed, while your spouse only cares about the ones on which you lay your heads, re-evaluate how important it is for the other person to join your Pinterest-Perfect perspective.
In other words, work together to find a “win” that’s valid for everyone concerned. If the reason for organizing is more tangible and meaningful than “The house looks so much nicer when it’s feng-shui-ed and organized,” then you never have to fear your darling’s resentment over couch cushions bubbling up into a loud, public reference to Doctor Who villains.
6) THINK OUTSIDE THE STORAGE BOX AND CONSIDER OUTSIDE RESOURCES
Have patience, and recognize that not everyone starts from the same place. It’s pointless to yell, “You should know how to do this!” and it’s unreasonable to expect that everyone has the same skills of pattern recognition or ability to conceptualize abstract solutions. Similarly, there are areas where there are no rights and wrongs, but merely where couples have differing organizing styles and retrieval preferences.
You wouldn’t set your own arm if it were broken, would you? You don’t expect people to be able to churn their own butter. Convey to your spouse the idea of organizing as a combination of skill and training. Can’t we all use a little help with some things? If you’re having trouble working things out together, discuss getting a trainer for *organizational* fitness!
Engaging the services of a professional organizer allows both you and your beloved to benefit from the technical expertise of a neutral, judgment-free third party. A professional organizer can provide advice and solutions that neither of you might have even considered, allowing you to move forward as loving, equal partners. (One might even say, as Valentines.)
Visit the National Association of Professional Organizers to find someone who can help you and your spouse find common ground for your organizing solutions. Neighbors to the north can check in with Professional Organizers in Canada.) The Board of Certification of Professional Organizers also has an online directory of its certificants (Paper Doll, included). And if you and/or your honey are dealing with more complex issues than situational disorganization, you may very well benefit from the guidance of the dedicated experts affiliated with the Institute for Challenging Disorganization.
Readers, unlike the TARDIS, your drawers and cabinets are not bigger on the inside. Only so much stuff can fit in so much space. But if you take this organizing advice to heart, there will always be enough space for you and the one you love.
Smead, Secrets for Organizing a Small Business, and the New TV Season
Long before Paper Doll became a professional organizer, I was a television character. No, not a character on television, but one whose personality and intellect was lovingly devoted to TV.
Not only was my first career as a television program director (for Fox, UPN and WB stations), but my life was guided by the broadcast schedule. (Yes, kids, in the olden days, all television was available only via broadcast, and you watched it while it was airing, not when it was convenient for you. Pretty disorganized, eh?)
– National Archives and Records Administration
In recent years, I’ve had some fun appearing on the modern version of television — online video — from short tips and product testimonials for Rubbermaid and Smead to longer video interviews, like this year’s Delegate Like a Boss. (I’ve even had some forays into audio, participating in various teleseminar series like Declutter Your Life, talking about eliminating paper clutter, and radio interviews like WGOW-FM’s Chewin’ the Chatt (start at about 3:15), on organizing strategies for senior citizens.
But this summer, I had an especially fun time talking with John Hunt on episode #41 of Smead’s Keeping You Organized podcast. We talked about the “secrets” to organizing a small business, focusing on paper management and information flow, and I even got to promote my recently published book, 57 Secrets for Organizing Your Small Business.
There was no fancy green room and no celebrities for me to make room for on the couch, but it was a lively discussion about a topic near and dear to my heart, organizing all that important stuff so you can think about that information contextually instead of just trying to think of it, so it doesn’t fall out of your head.
[There’s an audio-only option for those of you who — like I — get a bit distracted by the close-up editing and my humidity-inspired Art Garfunkel hair.]
I was thrilled to be part of the first season of the Keeping You Organized podcasts, but like any true television aficionado, I’m also excited about the new season. As a TV person, that means combing the TV Guide Fall 2014 Schedule to figure out what I’ll be watching each night. And as a professional organizer, it means I’ll be waiting for this week’s launch of the second season of Keeping You Organized.
Until then, I invite you all to catch up on the first season highlights with professional organizing All-Stars like Geralin Thomas, Ramona Creel, Leslie Josel, Ellen Delap, Deb Lee, and more.
Welcome to September! New school year, new TV season, new opportunities for Keeping You Organized. Happy new year, Paper Doll readers!
My “Delegate Like A Boss” Interview: Encore on Monday, 2/3/14
Paper Doll readers, are you still feeling overwhelmed?
A few weeks ago, I told you about the Delegate Like a Boss video summit in which I was participating.
At the time, I said:
Are you trying to do it all? (You know you are.) And are you completely overwhelmed by the idea that everything you’re asked to do, everything you’re supposed to do, and everything you want to do can’t quite fit into those measly 24 hours assigned to you? (Take note: we’ve all got the same 24 hours, so if it seems like someone else is rocking getting it all done, consider that maybe they’re not doing it all themselves!)
(Read the original post to learn more.)
It was so much fun working with Susan Brennan of Consider It Done Personally to be part of her Delegate Like a Boss video summit. So I was REALLY excited when Susan informed me that my interview was a top-three favorite and will have an encore this Monday, February 3, 2014. So, if you missed it the first time around (or didn’t realize it was free, fun and fabulous), here’s your second chance. Just sign up at the Delegate Like a Boss link and you’ll be able to watch the encore.
See you there!
Delegate Like a Boss (Even When You’re a Party of One)
Are you trying to do it all? (You know you are.) And are you completely overwhelmed by the idea that everything you’re asked to do, everything you’re supposed to do, and everything you want to do can’t quite fit into those measly 24 hours assigned to you? (Take note: we’ve all got the same 24 hours, so if it seems like someone else is rocking getting it all done, consider that maybe they’re not doing it all themselves!)
Although I usually talk to you about organizing tangible things, organizing time and tasks (and clarifying how we think about time and tasks) is also essential to a happy life. That’s why I am so excited to have partnered with Susan Brennan of Consider It Done Personally to be part of her upcoming Delegate Like a Boss video summit.
Success means being able to do what you want when you want (at least as much as is practical), and in order to do that, Susan has put together an exciting opportunity to help people, as she says, “achieve time freedom and be more productive than ever before!”
I have been given a special invitation to join Susan and her amazing band of experts (including my esteemed organizing colleague Donna Smallin Kuper and a variety of coaches and other professionals) to help create the change so many people are looking for. This summit is going to give you the tips and tools you need to achieve your own time freedom so you can do more of what you want, when you want! It is a privilege to join with these other experts to help make that happen!
You all know how frugal Paper Doll is, so I’m especially impressed with just how much information is going to be given out for free in this summit! And, in addition to the material presented in the video summits, many of the participants (including moi) are giving away special bonuses. You longtime readers know how rarely I (OK, practically never) promote events, but I have been so excited to talk about delegating (something at which I think we all need some extra help) that I want to encourage you all to sign up.
So, some info from Susan, our fearless leader:
Imagine being able to do what you want, when you want, without giving up productivity. What if you could begin experiencing that time freedom immediately, just like you’ve always dreamt!
Have you ever found yourself thinking these things?
• Why do other people seem to have so much more free time than me?
• How come I am feeling so behind all of the time?
• Why does my To Do list feel like it’s never-ending?
• Why does vacation never seem to fit into my chaotic schedule?
If any of those questions sound like ones you’ve asked yourself, keep reading.
I know that once you discover how to have time freedom, you’re going to begin enjoying life to the fullest without feeling guilty about it!
Wouldn’t you like to join the thousands of others who are experiencing this very thing? Here’s your chance! Please share this with the people in your life who could benefit from this summit.
The information you’re going to receive on this summit is easily worth thousands of dollars, but I’m giving you access for free, as a special gift!
So, this Delegate Like a Boss video summit is happening next week (if you still don’t have your 2014 calendar yet, that’s the week of January 20th!), and you can join in (again, at no cost) but you have to reserve your virtual seat soon. Begin experiencing the life you want, when you want, without compromising productivity or inviting overwhelm.
I invite you and anyone in your life who feels bogged down by their To Do list to join me and my fellow video summit presenters for “Delegate Like a Boss”. Just click through, sign up, and Susan will email you the essentials. None of the interviews will be long — most are 15-30 minutes (though you know Paper Doll is full of words and will take up every square micro-second).
But seriously, if you think of delegating as something only CEOs get to do, I think you’ll find this an eye-opening video summit for giving you a new way to look at getting things done…productively.
Seek (with Bluetooth) and Ye Shall Find: Tile and Stick-N-Find
Getting organized is about letting go of what you don’t need and arranging what you wish to keep so that you can find it when you want it. There are foolproof ways to keep from losing anything:
1) Designate a home for every item.
2) Don’t put things down; put them away. (In other words, follow step #1 and then use it.)
3) Practice mindfulness so that you can perfect your skills at step #2.
This process is all well and good unless:
- you live and/or work with other humans
- you have tiny humans who like to grab and hide your possessions
- you have tiny (and not so tiny) non-humans in your midst
- you aren’t always so good at mindfulness
- you are so busy corralling your fellow humans, tiny humans and non-humans that you don’t have the time or energy and OH MY LORD JUST FIND MY KEYS AND STOP PONTIFICATING!
Keeping track of small things, even when we’ve isolated homes for them, can be difficult. Years ago, we applauded (literally) a movement to attach little electronic doodads to keys, remote controls and other small devices. We’d clap, and a little alarm would beep to help us find the missing items. In theory, great. In practice, it made people feel like they’d woken up inside a commercial for The Clapper!
Technology has allowed for the development of more refined solutions like Bluetooth-supported tools to locate items with ease. Two options getting attention these days are Tile and Stick-N-Find.
The Basics: Tile is a small, white, flat-ish, plastic square with a hole carved in one corner. Thread key chains and zipper pulls (on purses, wallets, backpacks, or children’s jackets) through the hole, or use the enclosed double-backed adhesive on the reverse of a Tile to stick it to virtually anything. You can also just drop it in a pocket, your wallet’s change compartment or the bottom of a purse. Tile is waterproof, but even if your little ones lose their boots, I wouldn’t test the limits.
Tile is designed so that you never have to charge it or replace the battery. Instead, each lasts one year. Then poof, and you have to buy more. On the one hand, shopping for (and replacing) coin cell batteries is a pain. On the other, a new Tile is pricier than a new battery. Tile sends you an alert when it’s time to replace (and recycle) for a new year.
The Works: When you pull Tile out of the box, you depress the “e” on the face of it and then go to your mobile device. Once you’ve downloaded the free app, go to the Add a Tile screen and hold your new Tile up to your iPhone. The app then automatically adds the Tile to your account. Currently, Tile works with iOS products like iPhones (5c and 5s) and iPads (3rd and 4th generation, Mini and Air). Because it functions with Bluetooth 4.0, it’s not yet supported to work with Android, Blackberry or Windows devices. You can have up to ten Tiles on any one account, but it’s not clear to Paper Doll why there’s a limit since you’re paying for each individual Tile, anyway.
Can’t find your keys in your pile of clutter? Use the app to make your Tile’s teeny built-in speaker sound an alarm. Your kid left his backpack…somewhere…and it could be anywhere in the mall? The app will pinpoint the location on the map. And since the app uses Bluetooth, it remembers the last GPS location it “saw” your item, so if it hasn’t moved, the item can be found lickety-split! You can log into your account from any iOS device, meaning that if you misplaced your iPhone and never activated a service like Find My iPhone (silly you) you can use someone else’s phone to find yours.
The Range: Tile’s app isn’t going to know if your wallet just got on a plane to Barbados. But the app can locate your Tile anywhere up to 50 to 150 feet away, “depending on the environment.” (One assumes this means either mountains or steel girders may interrupt the signal.) Interestingly, however, if your Tile is farther away than that BUT another Tile user’s phone/device is within 50 to 150 feet of your Tile, the information will daisy-chain and you’ll get an update with the location of your own Tile, giving you a pin on the map view. The theory is that once zillions of people are using Tile, the eventual range would be practically limitless. Blue sky thinking? Perhaps.
The Cost: Tile is available for pre-order (to-be-delivered Summer 2014) at $19.95 each, or at package pricing of “Buy 3, get one free,” “Buy 6, get two free,” and “Buy 9, get 3 free.” But once Tile is widely available commercially, the price will go up to $25/each. Yikes!
The Basics: The round, discs (“trackers”) are available in six colors (well, five plus “clear”) in case you want a little designer panache with your private-eye tool.
Unlike Tile, the Stick-N-Find trackers use traditional CR2016 coin-style watch batteries, which last about a year. Stick-N-Find discs come with 3M-brand double-sided adhesive stickers. Each pack comes with two Stick-N-Find discs and two key fob mounting plates.
The Works: Pair a Stick-N-Find tracker with your (free) Radar app. Like Tile, Stick-N-Find’s app works via Bluetooth 4.0, but is supported on a broader range of devices, including iPhone 4s, iPhone 5c and 5s, newer iPads, including the Mini, and iPod Touch, as well as Samsung-branded Android devices, including Galaxy S3, Galaxy S4, Galaxy S4 Mini, and Note 2, and any future devices using Bluetooth Low Energy.
The Range: Supporting materials for Stick-N-Find reference ranges of both 100 and 150 feet, and the Radar app should track up to 20 of your Stick-N-Find discs. It doesn’t exactly pin-point your tagged item; instead, the app gives you a visual of how far you are from the item, but doesn’t identify the direction. As they, themselves, note, it’s a bit like playing the old game “You’re getting warmer. You’re getting colder.” Paper Doll would find this annoying, but others might enjoy the adventure.
The Virtual Leash lets you set an audio alarm/alert if an item leaves a pre-set radius around you; the disc will also flash lights in case you’ve dropped your wallet at a dark, noisy party. The Find It function lets you know when an item has come in to range, within 300 feet. (You’re getting warmer…)
The Cost: Each 2-tracker pack costs $49.99 (or 4 for $89.99, 6 for $129.99, 10 for $199.99 and 20 for $389.99) from the Stick-N-Find store; Stick-N-Find is also sold under the Smead brand name and can be found at office supply stores and on Amazon.
Trackable Items
Practically anything can be tracked by Bluetooth tracking devices.
- Things you carry: luggage, wallets, backpacks, purses, phones, laptops, tablets, day planners, musical instruments, gym bags, medical devices, passports, travel document portfolios
- Things that wander off by themselves: pets (affix to their collars), tiny humans (attach to children’s shoelaces)
- Things you share, which wander off when someone else moves them: keys, remote controls, garage door openers, cameras, bicycles, skateboards
Would you use Tile or Stick-N-Find, or does the pricing put you off? What are you always losing and seeking? Please share below.
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